Women of America: Serve your country and expect to get raped

Back in my day, I’m a Vietnam veteran, men and women in the armed forces were separated (with a few exceptions made for secretarial pools). There was the men’s barracks, and there was the women’s barracks. Both verboten to step into unless you were the right sex.

  I can clearly remember that most of the guys were young, like myself, and so full of testosterone that we were always thinking about women and how much we wanted to be with them. We were like a pack of dogs when a WAC walked by…barking and preening.

Each trying to outdo the other’s wolf whistle. It was clear to the military community at the time that mixing the sexes was a bad idea, and would lead to problems. How could they expect those pumped up GI’s or Marines to act like gentleman?

There’s a pack factor in the military. If one person does something – let’s say something questionable – the pack closes around them in a united front. It’s been that way since the first military unit was formed back in the dawn of history.

But something happened in the name of political correctness, and men and women in the military were suddenly working side-by-side. Living in the same dormitories. Training together. Going into combat areas together. Some idealist thought that the men’s basic instincts could be controlled and they would universally respect the women they were serving with.

The reality is reflected in the headlines today: 1) Lawsuit claims rape, misconduct at D.C. Marine Barracks

2) Sexual Assaults on Female Soldiers: Don't Ask, Don't Tell 

3) 1/3rd of Women in US Military Raped

4.) Rape in the US military: America's dirty little secret

I think it’s a shame what’s happening to these women. If asked, back in the day, if I thought men and women could work closely together in the military without problems, I would have raised one eyebrow and said, “Hell No! Are your crazy?”

The military brings out the savage side in men. It’s part of the macho society in uniform. The younger men especially view women (in or out of uniform) as sex objects there for the taking. Unless you’ve been in the military, you can’t understand what I’m talking about.

I’m not saying those macho, testosterone-packed men are right, and it’s just a matter of “boys will be boys.” I am saying the clowns who thought this Co-Ed military thing would work were wrong. The proof is in the headlines. Call me old-fashioned, but I have the common sense to know when something won’t work.

This is just my opinion, so take it for what it’s worth. If you agree, or disagree with me, I would like to hear what you think? Should we go back to separating the sexes, with exceptions? 

Goodies at the Movies: Man sues theatre over the cost of snacks

         Good Day Humboldt County!

The road to entertaining ourselves can often be an expensive trip. I remember going to inside theatres when I was young, and the price of snacks didn’t seem as outrageous as today.

Nowadays, I seldom go to the movies, as I  prefer to rent them when they come out. The last time I did go, taking three grandchildren with me, was a wallet shocking experience!

  The thing of it is, the movies can charge whatever they want for snacks, even if it’s three times higher than anywhere else. Free enterprise baby. That’s okay. Moviegoers don’t have to pay if they think the price is too high. But, let’s face it, movie theatre owner’s gamble on the fact they have a captive audience that is hungry from the moment of the opening scene.

I have to admit I never thought of suing the theatres for their high price goodies. I’m just not the type of guy who goes around suing people. However, one man from Livonia, Michigan, has decided to make a court case out of it:

News snippet:

“Who hasn't stood in front of a movie theater concession stand and been stunned by the prices of snacks and drinks? $5 for a bottled water? $8 for a bag of popcorn? $4 for a box of M&Ms? If regular moviegoers haven't smuggled in their own snacks, they've almost certainly thought about it.

Joshua Thompson of Livonia, Mich., actually did something about it. He filled a class action suit against his local AMC Theater protesting the snack overpricing, the Detroit Free Press reported.”

Time for me to walk on down the road….

Have you ever………… been sooo tired?

 

 

Go here to see some more great photos of tired animals and babies.

Coming Soon: really fast robots made to wage world wide wars

Let’s face it, man has been suspicious of robots since the first one was cobbled together out of scrap metal pieces.

Here’s an article that depicts fast robots for future wars. The inventors say it can also be used for humanitarian purposes. Wanna bet that doesn’t happen?

News snippet:

“If there's anything scarier than a cheetah coming after you, it'd have to be a headless robo-cheetah coming after you at record speed.

That nightmare is now a reality thanks to DARPA's Cheetah robot, whose 18 mph pace has set a land speed record for machines with legs.”

It doesn’t look like a cheetah, but the suckers sure fast!

The feat, revealed today on the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency's website, is aimed at developing combat robots that can outrun and evade humans on foot — and a 3:20 mile should just about do it. (The world record for humans is 3:43.) Boston Dynamics has been working on the cheetah-bot as part of DARPA's Maximum Mobility and Manipulation program, or M3.

The company says that in addition to the military applications, the robots can be used for humanitarian purposes such as emergency rescue and disaster response.”

Friend? Anything But: Yoga guru sullies ancient philosophy

    Good Day Humboldt County!

What happens to people who follow roads of enlightenment that later turn out to be paths of destruction? If they’re lucky, they learn a lesson and move on to better things.

If they’re not so lucky, they die like the disciples of that crazed lunatic, the Rev.Jim Jones, founder and leader of the Peoples Temple, which is best known for the November 18, 1978 mass suicide of 913 Temple members in Jonestown, Guyana.

I ran across another false prophet recently. He teached a so-called life-affirming Tantric philosophy called Anusara yoga. It gained world-wide renown in recent years, but the founder’s vision is littered with loot and lies.   John Friend, the founder of Anusara yoga, (photos above) is facing some serious accusations of both sexual and financial misconduct. Unlike that madman Jones, Friend has not hurt anyone physically. Mentally, it’s another story. Friend has taken a leave of absence, sent out a public letter of apology and told his many followers that he's immersing himself in a period of "self-reflection, therapy and personal retreat," according to numerous news outlets.

While he’s on his retreat somewhere between 60 to 75 teachers have resigned.People are wondering if Friend's alleged penchant for sex, drugs and other peoples' money will taint the entire community of yoga, a form of exercise that touts physical as well as mental and spiritual discipline. It’s hard to say.

I suspect, Friend (was there ever more irony to a name?) mixed just enough good advice with outright bullshit to keep everyone bamboozled. In a zone as it were. I’m not mocking yoga here folks, so uncurl yourselves from the lotus position and read on:

News Snippet:

"My guru was very clear on this point," Tommy Rosen, who's been practicing yoga for 20 years said. "When you teach yoga, there's a mantra you say before you teach. 'I am not a man. I am not a woman. I am not a person. I am not myself. I am a teacher.' When you step into a yoga studio and you're the teacher, there needs to be a boundary there." (source)

Time for me to walk on down the road…

Help! I don’t have my mobile phone and I’m nomophobic

                                        

By Dave Stancliff/For The Times-Standard
 I remember growing up with one phone in our house. It was considered a luxury, not a necessity. You couldn’t take the phone outside, but if you were out in public, there were things called phone booths.
 If you’re thirty or younger, you can Google “phone booths” to see what I’m talking about. The other day I read about a collector (of what the article didn’t say) who bought a “gently” restored (mostly original parts) 1905 phone booth for $35,000! Who knew?
 Part of the reason that old phone booth sold for $35,000 was because it was a first of it’s kind. It really looked nice with a solid wood panel door and double-glass windows and walls for sound proofing.

  I seldom used phone booths. They always made me claustrophobic. I seldom called anyone until I was a teenager, at which time my calls were made from home so I didn’t have to put my money into a pay phone. Another reason I didn’t like phone booths.

  At no time - and you can quote me - was I ever worried about having to make a phone call. If an emergency came up I dealt with it. The result wasn’t always pretty, but I’m still here, right?
  I assure you, the idea of carrying a phone around with me was as foreign as those little people in Asia fighting over some country called Vietnam. I never dreamt of the possibility. I was clueless as to the onrushing technology that would soon be found in nearly every American home.
  In 1977, my second son was born and the first cell phone was made in Chicago. Then companies in other places started to make cell phones. As you may suspect, there are now more cell phones than landline phones.
The results of last year’s semiannual US wireless industry survey (go to http://www.ctia.org/advocacy/research/index.cfm/AID/10316 ) were stunning to say the least; 91 percent of Americans have a mobile phone!
  All of which leads me to my main point today: The fear of being without your mobile phone is on the rise. The experts even have a name for this fear; nomophobia, or No Mobile Phobia. It’s defined as the anxiety a person feels when out of range of a cell phone tower, or if they don’t have their mobile phone with them for some reason.
This phobia, according to a recent CBS News report, is a growing problem. A recent poll in the United Kingdom said sixty-six percent of respondents reported being nomophobic.
 It came as no surprise to me that the 18 to 24-year olds were the most likely to report being afraid without their mobile phone. This new condition is a generational thing, from everything I’ve read thus far.
 The younger you are, the more likely you will be stricken with this fear, according to the researchers. The study said women are more likely to worry than men if they don’t have their mobile phone with them. That makes sense to me.
  The study also concluded that “more than one in two” nomophobes never switch off their mobile phones.
Old timers like myself are less likely to panic if we forget to take our cell phones with us. That’s not to say I haven’t got a tiny bit spoiled by the convenience of carrying one. I seldom use the thing, but I admit it’s comforting to know that if I fall down and can’t get up, I can fish it out of my pocket and call for help.

In a complete moment of transparency, I’m copping to a growing case of nomophobia! I can sympathize with those youngsters today who never knew about things like phone booths, and who got their first mobile phone when they learned how to string sentences together using abbreviations and popular slang.

 There’s no turning back now. Any day I expect to hear that newborn cell phones - pink or blue, take your choice - will be given to new mothers and fathers when they check out of the hospital (sponsored by one of the megalithic mobile phone makers, of course).
  It sure would be nice if I could swap phobias. Out with the old claustrophobia, and in with the new nomophobia.

   As It Stands, unfortunately it doesn’t work that way. I just have two phobias now.

Journey heads home: Lone gray wolf’s epic hunt for a mate or pack

              Good Day Humboldt County!

  Like humans, wolves sometimes travel a lonely road in life. I’ve been following the exploits of one gray male wolf since last November.

  I wondered what was happening to him during his travels because there was very little chance of finding a mate in the direction he was heading. I thought about his lonely journey, and envisioned adventures that he must be having. Close calls perhaps?

I really didn’t expect an update on the wolf, whose name is Journey. Then I ran across this article:

Snippet:

“The wandering gray wolf who last year became the first wild wolf recorded in California since the 1920s crossed the border Thursday and headed back to his home state of Oregon.The young male, nicknamed Journey by a conservation group, entered California in late December, attracting international attention. He remained on the move, trotting nearly 1,000 miles in three Northern California counties, crossing highways, pine forests, scrubland and even ancient lava flows.

“Biologists say OR7, as the animal is officially known, is doing what young wolves do: setting out on its own to find a mate, establish a new pack or perhaps join another one.”

Photo above:

This Nov. 14 photo from a hunter's trail camera appears to show OR-7, the young male wolf that has wandered more than 2,000 miles around Oregon and Northern California looking for a mate and a new home. (Allen Daniels, Associated Press)

Living illusions: people with tattoos offering optical views

Above left - Here’s an excellent skull illusion tattoo involving two clowns holding hands while drinking. The tattoo, by Kate Hoogland, just might contain the most romantic skull illusion ever.

Above – right - a brilliant rendition of M.C. Escher’s Drawing Hands illusion. The piece, done by Cheryl Volling, has some absolutely stunning shading, giving it the life-like appearance of the original Escher drawing.

 

Here’s a great tattoo with a double meaning. Is it a face or a cartoonish man playing saxophone?

For more great examples of illusion tattoos go here.

Winning: Whatever it takes…even maintaining a bounty on foes

The first football coach to be canonized by the sport was Vince Lombardi. It was he who said, “If winning isn't everything, why do they keep score?”

Nothing has really changed since Lombardi’s days, and this latest story about the National Football League illustrates that:
New Orleans Saints players and at least one assistant coach maintained a bounty program the last three seasons for inflicting game-ending injuries on opposing players, including Brett Favre and Kurt Warner — a pool that reached as much as $50,000 and paid specific amounts for ''cart-offs'' and ''knockouts,'' the NFL said today. I can’t say I’m really surprised.

I can recall many conversations with other football fans who also wondered if teams purposely targeted other teams quarterbacks over the years. Not one of us thought of a paid bounty plan however. The Saints are the first team caught doing this. Maybe they were the only team that has ever had a bounty program. Frankly, I think there’s other teams out there that have/had similar incentive programs to take out opponent’s quarterbacks.

Remember; it’s all about winning. Especially in this day and age. It doesn’t matter how your crossed the finish line, it only matters that you’re the first one to do so. Second place is unacceptable. Like actor Charlie Sheen said (during a drug crazed rant), “Winniiiiing!”

Fighting Childhood Obesity: not a pretty picture but we can’t ignore it

                Good Day Humboldt County!

It’s a difficult road we’re taking today. One paved with obese children from coast to coast. For whatever reasons, we’ve become an overweight nation, and our future precariously promises a growing population of fat, unhealthy kids.

The National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance got pissed off at a new Walt Disney World Epcot exhibit on childhood obesity and demanded they take it down. The exhibit was closed shortly after its unofficial opening in February, the Orlando Sentinel reported Thursday. The official opening has been postponed.

News Snippet:

“Peggy Howell, a spokeswoman for the group, said "These pictures further the stigma against people of higher body weight."

The interactive exhibit (Graphic on right), Habit Heroes, featured animated fitness superheroes Will Power and Callie Stenics and super-sized villains Snacker and Lead Bottom, who eat junk food and watch too much television. Critics said the exhibit reinforces stereotypes that obese children are lazy and have poor eating habits.

Blue Cross and Blue Shield partnered with Disney to create the exhibit. Blue Cross spokesman John W. Herbkersman said the exhibit was meant to be helpful.

"Our goal is to ensure that the attraction conveys a positive message about healthy lifestyles in a fun and empowering way," Herbkersman said. "To work on further improving and refining the experience, the attraction is closed for the time being. We look forward to officially opening it soon."

I’ve got to tell you I have mixed feelings about what happened. I can see both sides point. But,I also know we can’t hide from the epidemic of childhood obesity in this country.

We ignore these kids health at their risk. If there isn’t more programs and information on fighting this problem, the country is doomed in more ways than one. We’ve become a nation of fatties. We’ve got to do something about it.

Time for me to walk on down the road…

This Cube Optical Illusion Only Works Once

Keep your eyes on the floating cube…

At first it looks like the checkered cube is floating…

but once you find out the trick, the checkered cube can never fool you again.

You can feel better about your IQ now. Your brain is smarter than you think!

Conservative firebrand Breitbart dies at 43: He was a classic example of what was wrong with our national discourse

      Karma is about reaping what you sow.

Then:

In the hours immediately following Senator Ted Kennedy’s death, Andrew Breitbart called Kennedy a "villain", a "duplicitous bastard", a "prick" and "a special pile of human excrement.

Now:

Conservative firebrand Andrew Breitbart dies at age 43 (Note: check out comment section below article. I’ve never seen so many deleted comments after a story!). Known for saying hateful things, and outright lies about people who didn’t agree with his political agenda, Breitbart seemed to thrive on hate and his critics were quick to point this out.

I have no intention of giving you a summary of his life and times, as I ignored him when he was alive. Instead, here’s a link, and here’s another one. My final thought is about the people who are saying hateful things about him when they hear/read about his death:

A fitting goodbye salute for someone who capitalized on hate, and who set the standard for right wing extremists.

Another victory for corporate power: U.S. judge sides with tobacco companies

                                                        Good Day Humboldt County!

There comes a time in all of our lives when we come to a crossroad that offer us a choice that could change our lives. For good or bad.

For those who smoke cigarettes (I was among that group for 25 years before finally quitting in January 2000) they’re putting their health at risk.

Sometimes Unknowingly at first. My generation is a good example of that.

We had doctors, dentists, movie stars, and famous people endorsing them. Cigarettes were sexy and the smart thing to do.

I remember seeing ads with Ronald Regan singing the praise of Chesterfields.

Brands like Camel, Viceroys, Chesterfields, Pall Mall, Philip Morris, and Lucky Strikes made smoking seem like such a natural thing to do. Since then, however, the truth has come out and the worst thing you could do for your health is to smoke cigarettes.

Countless studies detail the diseases that stem from their use, but people continue to smoke them. The reason why: corporate power trumps Americans health.

In another example of corporate power in America, the death dealers, aka cigarette manufacturers, have chipped away at the warnings they were forced to put on their deadly product. Bottom line, cigarettes can and will kill, but in the name of thinly disguised free speech violation, they will continue to sicken and kill millions of Americans with impunity.

The real issue is: Why the Hell are the damn things still legal after everything we know about them?

Snippet: 

“A U.S. judge sided with tobacco companies on Wednesday, ruling that regulations requiring large graphic health warnings on cigarette packaging and advertising violate free-speech rights under the U.S. Constitution. Cigarette makers challenged the U.S. Food and Drug Administration's rule requiring companies to label tobacco products with images of rotting teeth, diseased lungs and other images intended to illustrate the dangers of smoking.”

The case is R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Co et al v. FDA, U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia, No. 11-1482.

Time for me to walk on down the road…

Forget about that Man on the Moon – how about that Face on Mars?

In 1976 the Viking Or­biter ra­dioed back many im­ages from Mars. Among those form the Cy­do­nia re­gion, one de­picted a rock for­ma­tion that strongly re­sem­bled a human or hu­manoid face star­ing straight up into the heav­ens.

You can prob­a­bly guess what was made of this… ‘Parei­do­lia’ is the term for neu­ro­log­i­cal or psy­cho­log­i­cal phe­nom­ena where vague im­ages are in­ter­preted by the brain as spe­cific im­ages. Sta­tis­ti­cally speak­ing, it is a type I error, a “false pos­i­tive”.

A nice ar­ti­cle “Para­nor­mal Phe­nom­ena: The Face on Mars: Once and for All” con­tains some back­ground ma­te­r­ial on the en­su­ing ker­fuf­fle, in­clud­ing links to large NASA im­ages of the en­tire re­gions pho­tographed.

In 1998, the Mars Global Sur­veyor (MGS) reached the Red Planet with far bet­ter, more high-res­o­lu­tion equip­ment than Viking had car­ried. Ini­tially, NASA had not planned to re-map the Cy­do­nia re­gion, but pub­lic out­cry was so great that in April 1998, the MGS was pro­grammed to re-pho­to­graph seg­ments of the Cy­do­nia re­gion, in­clud­ing at least one of the face (there was also some­thing on ‘pyra­mids’ there which we will not cover here). If you move the mouse over the ad­ja­cent fig­ure, the newer photo ap­pears, roughly shifted and ro­tated to match the one taken 22 years ear­lier. You can judge for your­self whether you in­ter­pret this as a face – about 2.5 km tall, 2 km wide and about 0.5 km of height – star­ing right out into space…

Related:

In early 2006 a new face was found in Peru [GoogleMaps, Reg­is­ter ar­ti­cle]

And in Oc­to­ber 2006 an In­dian with an iPod… GoogleMaps

More: Holy Toast…

More on Parei­dola at The Scep­tics Dic­tio­nary

Federal Judge admits sending Racist e-mail - the reason: ‘I sent it out because its anti-Obama’

President W. Bush must be proud. One of his nominations for a federal judge is keeping the “Good Old Boy” mentality alive. 

Montana's U.S. District Chief Judge Richard Cebull (photo right) admitted to sending a racially charged e-mail about President Obama from his courthouse chambers today.

The forwarded text reads as follow:

"Normally I don't send or forward a lot of these, but even by my standards, it was a bit touching. I want all of my friends to feel what I felt when I read this. Hope it touches your heart like it did mine.

"A little boy said to his mother; 'Mommy, how come I'm black and you're white?' " the e-mail joke reads. "His mother replied, 'Don't even go there Barack! From what I can remember about that party, you're lucky you don't bark!' "

Here’s the thing:

The judge acknowledged that the content of the e-mail was racist, but said he does not consider himself racist. "The only reason I can explain it to you is I am not a fan of our president, but this goes beyond not being a fan," Cebull said. "I didn't send it as racist, although that's what it is. I sent it out because it's anti-Obama." (source)

School Shootings Cast Doubt on Threat of Al Qaeda

“This week’s school shooting in Chardon, Ohio, has predictably raised the issues of gun control and bullying.  In my mind one of the issues these school shootings highlights is the empty threat of al Qaeda.  Some of you are saying, “what the hell is he talking about?!“  Just give me a couple of paragraphs and I’ll explain.

We’re spending billions of dollars a year on fighting a “global war on terror” justified primarily on al Qaeda.  However, since 9/11, American students have killed more people in this country than al Qaeda.                       Consider the chart above:

For those counting, that’s School Shootings 98, al Qaeda 1 (maybe).

I’m not saying al Qaeda never existed, but they clearly peaked on 9/11.  Now either they are dead or have been defeated to the point of incompetence.  How else can you explain why they haven’t come close to matching the terror sown here by a few disturbed American children?  Mere children have been able to exploit American freedom and identify soft targets to strike.  I’m doubting that there is a well-funded international conspiracy that can’t match the horror of a few kids.

I can hear them now saying, “Well, we have to fight them over there, so we don’t have to fight them here.”  I’ll respond that if they were a serious threat we would in fact be fighting them here.  Since we haven’t been able to prevent a few American children from committing acts of terror in their schools, you would think the people who pulled off the 9/11 attacks would have done even more evil on American soil.

Look, I’m not daring al Qaeda to step up to the terror production of American 8-year-olds.  I’m saying the neocons and other hawks can no longer use al Qaeda as a boogeyman to justify outrageous overspending on the defense budget.  I’m done buying it.” – Words from Wisefather

The Vanishing Mind: Life, with dementia behind bars

      Good Day Humboldt County!

 The path to prison life is littered with mistakes – or intentional unlawful actions – that result in a rapidly growing prisoner population.

  Do you know that we incarcerate more people than any other country in the world? That we are prison central?

  This results in many problems, as you can surmise. Today, we’re going to look at one aspect of prison life that not too many of us are aware of. Have you ever wondered what happened to those prisoners who have Alzheimer’s disease and  other types of dementia. The following story first appeared in The New York Times on Feb. 25th, and has since been picked up by numerous other outlets.

I think you’re going to be surprised when you read this story. It’s a tale of redemption for the very worst behind bars. It’s a sneak peak at a world none of us would ever see otherwise. Compassion and understanding coming from convicted killers makes you realize they are still human beings.

Snippet:       

“Secel Montgomery Sr. stabbed a woman in the stomach, chest and throat so fiercely that he lost count of the wounds he inflicted. In the nearly 25 years he has been serving a life sentence, he has gotten into fights, threatened a prison official and been caught with marijuana.

Despite that, he has recently been entrusted with an extraordinary responsibility. He and other convicted killers at the California Men’s Colony help care for prisoners with Alzheimer’s disease and other types of dementia, assisting ailing inmates with the most intimate tasks: showering, shaving, applying deodorant, even changing adult diapers.”     (read the whole story here)

Time for me to walk on down the road…

Monkeys snatch cocktails from beachgoers, get wasted

Do you recall the phrase, “More fun than a barrel of monkeys?”

Imagine then, a barrel full of drunk monkeys! Now that would be entertaining.

Seeing as they are getting free drinks the least the silly simians could do would be to tip the waiters!

News Snippet:

“A video of monkeys getting drunk in the Caribbean might sound like it's solely for entertainment, but this BBC "Weird Science" footage of intoxicated vervet monkeys snatching drinks from unsuspecting beachgoers is unexpectedly informative.

While some monkeys go straight for the mai tais, others will only drink Fanta -- it turns out this group's population of nondrinking monkeys is roughly proportional to the teetotaling population in humans, which suggests that our alcohol preferences and tolerances are largely determined by our genetic makeup.

The scientists also observed that monkeys who are heavy drinkers might become better leaders; maybe they'll be mixing their own drinks soon.” (Source)

Part II: Rat bastard’s eventual fate and Viking sendoff…

After a barrage of emails inquiring what happened to the rat bastard, the answer is we discovered his body rolled up in the shower curtain (it had been thrown up over the rail to avoid touching the tub) when we pulled it back down looking for him. An anti-climatic plop! Then it was over. Well, not quite over…

We both felt kinda bad about killing him. Because of rat bastard’s Norwegian lineage it was decided to give him a real Viking fiery sendoff.First however, we looked up his ancestral backround.

Note the family coat of arms.Rat bastard descended from a long line of rat bastards whose roots in castles make them royal pains-in-the-asses!

We lovingly made this replica (above) of a Viking ship for rat bastard’s final send off. It took hours of dedicated work and attention to detail - dee tail. 

It was a real challenge trying to find an albino rat bastard willing to dress up and do the ancient chants for our deceased rat bastard. I won’t even go into how much cheese it took to pull this deal off other than to acknowledge he’s getting a life supply of sharp cheddar.

Because we knew there would be a large turnout for rat bastard’s funeral, we opened a small Rat Bastard Souvenir stand.

                                  Here are a few of the items we had for grieving mourners:

The hottest item was the packets of rat bastard poop at five bucks a pop.

The rat bastard stuffed doll was another item that was snatched up by saddened attendees.

The kids really liked listening to the old vinyl record playing the Adventures of Rat Bastard’s younger years.

Probably one of the most creative items offered were these tiny rat bastard masks made from slivers he chewed off of a our bathroom door!

Out here in the boonies we recycle everything.Needless to say it was a touching event as we launched the ship with rat bastard’s noble little ass in it! We soaked it in gasoline, after it floated out for a few feet, the guests shot miniature flaming arrows at it. A loud poooof!!!! And it was off to Vermin Valhalla.

 

Along with Shirley’s high wailing cries of grief, some of us chanted:

 “Hail Odin! Hail Thor!

  This is what you get when you sneak through our back door!”

So now you all know...the rest of the story!

Things I hope never to see in public - Part I: Large naked women stomping through driver’s windshields

I don’t know about you, but there’s things I hope to never run across while I’m out in public. The list is quite long, so I’m going to have to share examples one at a time to give each full exposure (pun intended).

My first example ( story below) scarred my brain (I admit it was the photo) even though I wasn’t personally there! It also cured my recent case of chronic hiccups!

Snippet: 

“It's hard to know who's having the worse day here: the naked woman stomping on this car or the guy the car belongs to. “The woman had been removed from a light-rail train wearing nothing but her shoes and was being evaluated by medical personnel when she "threw off the blanket that had been wrapped around her," according to SFist, and climbed on the hood of John Knight's Volvo before kicking in his windshield.

Knight won't be pressing charges against the woman; his biggest challenge might be convincing his insurance company of exactly how the damage occurred: "They didn't really know what to make of it," he said.”

Photo by Paula Maxa of said woman in action. [SF Gate]