Saturday, October 29, 2022

Rogue Rubber Duck on the Loose and other Crazy News

Late Breaking News

Last Thursday Maine's Belfast Harbor Office confirmed that a giant inflatable duck broke free of its moorings amid high winds and escaped.

The rogue duck eluded officials in the high winds and drifted about 20 miles to the coast of Blue Hill where residents were warned to stay indoors in case the duck came ashore (I just made that up).

Officials say the origin of the massive duck is a mystery.

Moving on

Researchers report that horror's impact is really in the eye of the beholder, a little different for everyone but not all bad.

So, the next time you watch a horror movie, and it scares the shit out of you... it could be a good thing.

Someone please explain that to my wife who loathes scary movies. I'm sure she doesn't agree with the so-called experts who claim getting frightened helps you to cope with things.


Supposedly humans are equipped with deeply ingrained, unconscious mechanisms that help them respond to stress, wired in from times when danger might be outside.

The next question is why do people go to horror movies in the first place? 

Researchers call it the "paradox of horror." In essence they claim people like being scared and it's a form of stress relief. 

Personally, I think these experts are wasting time and money on a subject no one cares about.

Moving on

Drama in North Carolina as sheriff's deputies came to the rescue of a loose emu that played "Frogger with traffic" on a busy highway.

The rogue emu made its way to Chockoyotte Park in Roanoke Rapids before being wrangled by deputies and returned to its owners.

Moving on

A South Carolina restaurant shared security footage of the moment a deer ran into the business through the open front door and ended up slipping and sliding around in the dining room.

Reports say the deer never got a chance to order a meal as employees unceremoniously "escorted" it outside. I guess they were afraid he wouldn't pay for his meal.

Moving on

More restaurant mayhem in Queensland, Australia where a reptile wrangler was chasing a three-foot monitor lizard in a local cafe.

The reptile wrangler later bragged that he completed more athletic events than an Olympian to get it. "There was running, diving, and of course wrestling," the proud wrangler told reporters.

Moving on

Somewhere in Carroll County, Indiana there's a rogue kangaroo roaming around after escaping its owner's property. 

As of this writing the kangaroo is still on the loose looking for eatable fruits, leaves, and flowering plants. Locals are being warned not to try and catch the kangaroo because he'll punch their lights out!

Finally, my favorite crazy news item has to be about a robot. Not just any robot. Researchers at the University of California-Berkeley unveiled a robot they said can fold clothes faster than any previous automaton.

Wow! This invention could save the world... but I don't think it will. Meanwhile where do you find one of these speedy little clothes folders? I've checked on Amazon. It's still too early. But it's just a matter of time.

As it stands, the giant rubber duck was last seen hooking up with buoy south of Blue Hill!

Friday, October 28, 2022

That's Twice Now: 'Where's Nancy?' is the Siren Call of the Far Right

Crazed rioters were screaming "Where's Nancy?" as they ransacked the capitol on Jan.6 looking to kill the Speaker of the House.

MAGA morons scrambled down corridors and beat on doors in their search for Nancy Pelosi during the insurrection.

The call for her murder went out years ago among the far-right loons that are now in bed with Republican lawmakers.

Current attack ads by MAGA candidates regularly assault Pelosi and call for her death or some horrible accounting - like putting her on a prison barge near Guantanamo Bay.

The violent rhetoric embraced by all the GOP candidates these midterms far surpass prior elections - even the 2020 election.

That caustic rhetoric trickles down to the real crazies who support the Big Lie and gives them a mission - kill democrats. 

In a recent unhinged rally in Pennsylvania the organizers displayed a poster with photos of democrats who they said are going to be visited by the Angel of Death. A thinly veiled threat. Pelosi was among the group of democrats on the poster.

The people who go to those hate rallies and watch hate TV like Fox and Newsmax, are often inspired to take action and do something really stupid and dangerous.

This morning the breaking news was Nancy Pelosi's husband Paul, was attacked in their home by a man who shouted, "Where's Nancy?" She was in Washington DC at the time.

Apparently, the assailant entered the Pelosi residence through the back door of the house according to authorities. 

Reports say Paul called 911 and defended himself with a hammer, but the attacker took it from him and used it on him. The police arrived and arrested the attacker, 42-year-old David DePape during the assault. 

Doctors said that Paul underwent surgery for a skull fracture and serious injuries to his right arm and hands. DePape was also hospitalized although it still isn't clear what injuries he suffered while attacking Paul and fighting off the police.

The 82-year-old Pelosi is expected to fully recover from his wounds.

How could that happen?

Pelosi's security detail wasn't at the house. The only time they are is if she's in attendance. That left her husband to fend for himself during the vicious attack.

The whole story isn't out yet because authorities are still investigating the motivation for the attack. 

I don't think it's unreasonable to point to the recent toxic politics, however. DePape's Facebook page showed he was an election denier and a far-right MAGA activist.

As it stands, that's twice now where the siren calls of the crazies called out Pelosi's name while searching for her. Let's hope the third time isn't the charm.

Thursday, October 27, 2022

There's No Need to Panic but We Are Living in the End Times

Throughout my life I've heard stories about what the End Times would be like. 

Mainstream and faux religions have sprung up around the concept of a final reckoning where mankind is going to experience the big payoff for generations of sins.

Well, we're living in an end time right now. Let me explain; the world has changed so much in the last fifty years that people's once normal lives have transformed into survival modes that include joining cults and defying reality in a quest for power.

The time to combat the global climate crisis is running out. Mankind has chosen to shit in the Garden of Eden, and now we have the devil to pay. 

Scientists recently announced that greenhouse gases have reached the highest levels ever and the U.N. put out a report saying the world is "Nowhere near" hitting climate targets.

Don't even get me started on what havoc droughts are causing worldwide. The mighty Mississippi River is shrinking at alarming rates. It's now so low that barges bringing supplies are no longer able to navigate great stretches of the famous river.

Related: Europe's mighty rivers are drying up in the climate-driven drought

And how about the damn COVID-19 pandemic that's been rocking the planet for years now and doesn't look like its ever going away?

To make matters worse we're currently experiencing a surge of viruses in kids. Three-quarters of pediatric hospital beds in America are now full.

Democracy is teetering on the brink of the abyss as a divided America struggles to coexist in the super-charged partisan atmosphere of the midterms...STOP!

Before you jump off a cliff let's consider a few things.

1. How many of the terrible things I listed above are actually affecting your day-to-day life? Take a moment on this one.

2. The most devasting effects of the climate crisis aren't predicting to happen for 50+ years or more. Disappearing coastlines and islands for example. There's a good chance you won't even be around by then. I know I won't unless I set a Guiness World record for old farts!

3. Consider that the whole idea of an end time is not locked into how long it'll take for all the horrible things to come into fruition. It's not like it'll happen overnight. I'm not even going to get into the religious interruptions that suggest otherwise. I'd rather use logic and observation.

As it stands, in summary, don't waste your time worrying about today or tomorrow. Just live your life as best as you can every moment.

Wednesday, October 26, 2022

Better Keep an Eye Out for a 'Deep State' McDonalds Near You

Welcome curious reader!

You must be interested in hearing all about the "Deep State" threats that Republicans are valiantly fighting to save America.

Please don't be offended, but would you mind putting a tin foil hat on to blend with the crowd I'm going to introduce you too? 

I'm going to take you back five days ago to a far-right gathering in Manheim, Pennsylvania titled "Re-Awaken America" where QAnon crazies mingled with Mega MAGA morons to celebrate... being crazy.

It wasn't your typical Trump rally because the Great Divider was holding a rally somewhere in Texas at the time. Instead, the loons pulled out their favorite Golden Trump idol onto the stage for the minions to bow before.

Favorite topics included Jewish Space lasers, Demonic Satellites', sending the holy ghost into computers to destroy them before election day, and (my favorite) Deep State McDonalds!

The organizer of the freak show, Clay Clark, whipped up the crowd when he declared there was a "war on food" and a shady left-wing entity was pushing for the feeding of "insect burgers" (I wonder what effect they would have?) at McDonalds.

The crowd went wild with the new knowledge that McDonalds was part of the ever-expanding Deep State threat. It beat the hell out of the one-time pedophile ring hidden in the basement of a private pizzeria.

Expect Trump minions to be seen skulking around McDonalds restaurants peering at people's burgers from beneath their MAGA caps at a McDonalds location near you.  

Deep State theories languished in the dark corners of the internet for years before Trump took it mainstream and claimed it (the Deep State) was working to overthrow his regime.

Have you ever heard the quote, "There's nothing new under the sun?"

The fact is so-called deep state conspiracies have a long and twisted history in the annals of mankind. Nothing new here with the exception that millions of Americans now firmly believe a deep state of some shape or form exists today.

The reason why is simple. Mass media platforms and the internet are a monolithic monster that devours truth and spews misinformation every hour of the day. It's the perfect swamp for deep state conspiracies to thrive in.

Your best defense against the deep state is the truth. Do your research. Facts kick MAGA minion's asses every time. It won't be easy but as long as there's deep state believers their lies need to be exposed to the rest of the world.

As it stands, I suspect McDonald's founder Ray Kroc is turning over in his grave right now!

Tuesday, October 25, 2022

About October Surprises: They All Have Murky Histories

My first question for readers today is, does anything surprise you about what's going on in this country nowadays?

My second question is, do you know what an October Surprise is in relation to politics? 

If not, an October Surprise is about a news event that may influence the outcome of an upcoming November election. Sometimes they are planned and sometimes they're spontaneous. Telling the difference keeps political pundits playing a partisan guessing game up to election day.

The forerunner of the October Surprise happened in mid-October of 1840, shortly before the 1840 presidential election when federal prosecutors announced plans to charge top Whig Party officials with "most stupendous and atrocious fraud" for paying Pennsylvanians to cross state lines and vote for Whig candidates in New York during the 1938 elections.

The Origin of the Term

During the 1980 presidential election, Republican challenger Ronald Reagan feared that a last-minute deal to release American hostages held in Iran might earn incumbent Jimmy Carter enough votes to win re-election.

William Casey, the manager of the Reagan campaign, was the first person to mention the idea of an "October Surprise" to the press by publicly claiming Carter was going to use the hostages to his advantage.

The only problem with that accusation was President Carter told the press that the hostages would not be released until after the election prior to the claim by Casey.

The truth didn't matter, however. Casey's ominous warnings of an October Surprise to the press was done for strategic reasons. It was intended to prepare the voters, so that if some good October news happened, the voters would look at the event as a political ploy by the Carter campaign.

Historians point out that Reagan's campaign more than likely made a deal with Iran whereby the Iranians would hold the hostages until after Reagan was elected and inaugurated.

Congress, like it often does elected not to take any action despite damning evidence presented in news stories by the New York Times, the Washington Post, and independent journalists.

The following decades experienced more October Surprises, and they all had one thing in common - they were murky in origin. 

So back to this October.

I have to wonder what could possibly qualify as a surprise in today's political climate?

Partisan bombshells explode daily with each side seeking an advantage going into November. You could safely argue that every day this month had a surprise - which in another age - would have simply been called chaos.

As it stands, despite stretching my brain to its outer limits, I cannot conceive of what would be big enough to be considered an October Surprise in 2022!

Monday, October 24, 2022

Americans Already Facing Harassment During Early Voting

Try to imagine what it would be like if you went to drop off your mail-in ballot at a designated drop box and masked armed men and women wearing militia gear stood a mere 75 feet away and began intimidating you with crazy questions and accusations.

You'd probably think you were in a south American country like Venezuela.

But it's already happening in Maricopa County, Arizona. The Department of Justice is investigating several cases of voter intimidation like the one described above.

It's not a mystery or a one-off event. Republicans in their lust for power are encouraging fully armed "monitors" to patrol drop boxes and polling stations across the country.

These so-called election guardians are full blown members of the Trump cult and are willing to do what it takes to see him assume power once again. 

I can't help wondering how local sheriffs are going to defuse the heavily armed watchers and protect voters' rights.

In Arizona the sheriff's department has responded by adding extra patrols to the voting areas. It's still a volatile situation with 15 days to go until November 8th.

I'm so disgusted that voting has now become another flashpoint between the two Americas where one side has gone bat shit crazy. You know which side I'm talking about.

Voter safety. 

Who ever dreamed that one of our basic freedoms - the right to vote - would become a such a point of contention in the 21st century?

Moving on.

There are dark ominous political clouds gathering across the nation as we draw near to the midterms. An early winter is showing itself in places like Great Falls, Montana with heavy snow fall and downed power lines.

It's our winter of discontent. We've survived many others. And here we are again. It's nothing new in this diverse nation.

For your own peace of mind ignore the polls and all the performance art playing out in politics. Their all a waste of your valuable time.

When all the votes are counted, we'll see what really happens and then we'll move on, one way or another.

As it stands, all of our freedoms must be rigorously defended if we are going to survive as a democratic republic.

Sunday, October 23, 2022

People Are Signing Up for 'What Me Worry Party?' the Hot New Ticket in Politics

Like any political party, the "What Me Worry Party" has a leader.

His name is Alfred E. Neuman. You may know him from his long association with Mad Magazine where he made his first appearance in 1954 when the magazine's editor Harvey Kurtzman introduced the iconic character.

I should point out that the "What Me Worry Party" members believe Neuman is an immortal. (That's no crazier than Trump followers who think he's the son of God). 

Followers cite the fact that Neuman made his first debut in public in a late nineteenth-century advertisements for painless dentistry.

As Neuman followers know that's where the motto "What Me Worry?" first appeared next to a portrait of him with his distinct smiling face, parted red hair, gap-tooth smile, freckles, protruding nose and scrawny body.

Some people may even recall when Neuman appeared on a presidential campaign postcard with the cation "Sure I'm for Roosevelt" in the early 1930s.

That's not all of Neuman's political chops. He ran for president in 1964 with the motto "What - Me Worry? I'm Voting Mad." 

His likeness was often substituted for President George W. Bush. Neuman's smiling face appeared on posters as part of the protest that accompanied Bush's 2001 inauguration.

Here's some visual examples of how involved Neuman has been in politics over the decades.

Who can ever forget when Neuman endorsed and congratulated Richard Nixon? Or, when he congratulated President John F, Kennedy for his big win?

Neuman is still popular in politics and can tout his experience with the current administration.

Neuman's quick insights have earned him the respect of a loyal following who agree with his philosophy that it's all bullshit and there's no use worrying about the state of politics - because it's a mad house.

As it stands, let's face it, nothing is too crazy during this election cycle.

Blog Break Until Presidential Election is Over

I finally hit the wall today. I can't think of what to say about all of the madness going on in this country right now. I'm a writer...