Reader alert! If satire, mockery, or parody harsh your high there's no reason to read any further.
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Okay boys and girls, it's time to see what's happening today...
Lawmakers from one side of the aisle are going to embarrass the hell out of the other side with a day devoted to outing their attempt to steal the 2020 election.
There's going to be videos of Trump followers swarming over the Capitol like cockroaches on a crusade.
A cascade of once-concealed texts will be raining down like drops of acid on Republicans retreating to their caves and yachts, and who have vowed an oath of silence regarding Trump's culpability in the coup attempt on Jan. 6.
I know you're disappointed that the former first grifter isn't have his press conference to counter today's activities. But buck up. There's still plenty to see.
Tune in your TV, get out the popcorn and make bets with family and friends about the possibility of a new revelation regarding Trump's obstruction of justice.
Basically, it's not going to be a good day for Trump minions and other spineless supporters in Congress.
Which reminds me. Wouldn't it be nice to see a list of GOP lawmakers complicit in the planning of the attack on the Capitol?
The extreme right could make trading cards with their names on them and the part they played in the insurrection.
Hint. Gym Jordan and Marjorie Taylor Green will be the hottest cards in the deck.
In what should be a day of shame to Republicans, they will settle into their alternate realities and wait until the storm passes. By Friday they'll emerge more energized and ready to go back to their outrageous lies that threaten our democracy.
There's going to be solemn prayer vigil for those who are into that kind of thing.
I'll tell you what boys and girls, there may be real Republicans in the hinterlands of this nation who are embarrassed at what the party has become. Just don't bet on it.
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