Sunday, March 1, 2020

Politicians Spirit Animals Revealed

Good Day World!

While smoking some intense ganja the other day with a Native American friend he shared some sacred insights into people's spirit animals.

Amazingly he could just look at a person, listen to them for a little bit, and then discern their spirit animal.

For the record, spirit animals are associated with age-old traditions, as well as shamanic beliefs, which teaches us to be closer to nature.

I decided to challenge him and asked him about current lawmakers in Congress.

Here is what he shared

Trump's spirit animal is a cross between a jackass and a loon. A Jackaloon.

Bill Barr's spirit animal is a rabid honey badger.

Mick Mulvaney's spirit animal is a skunk.

Mike Pence's spirit animal is a sheep.

Jim Jordan's spirit animal is a coyote on steroids.

Mike Pompeo's spirit animal is a vulture.

Kevin McCarthy's spirit animal is a turkey.

Betsy DeVos's spirit animal is a snake.

Mitch McConnell's spirit animal is a turtle.

Rob Portman's spirit animal is worm.  

Richard Shelby's spirit animal is rat.

Jim Sensenbrenner's spirit animal is a boar.

Mark Meadows's spirit animal is a cockroach. 

Matt Gaetz's spirit animal is a chicken.

Devin Nunes's spirit animal is an ostrich.

We talked late into the night and burned bowls by the campfire while he pointed out constellations and revealed that...

he was a Democrat!

Time for me to walk on down the road...

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