Have you heard the story of Bluto and how he became the president of the United States?
No? It may sound familiar, but don't let that bother you.
In summary; one morning a bird shit on Bluto's toupee and he didn't know it. He was getting out of his car when the loose-boweled bird let go with a orangish-yellow splatter as it flew overhead.
Bluto, who owned a company that was never unionized, was a bully. In fact, his employees feared him. No one dared to say something negative about Bluto or they'd end up losing their job.
So, when Bluto toured the building with his flunkies by his side, while checking on his employees, he made a comical sight. But no one laughed. Or said that he had bird shit on his head.
He went around all day sporting the spot on his toupee.
When he came home that night his wife saw the bird shit on his toupee and laughed. "What's that on your head?" she asked while trying to smother her mirth.
Bluto walked over to a mirror and stared at it. Then, instead of getting mad, he boasted, "My employees all love me so much that they didn't want to embarrass me by pointing this out."
The next day when Bluto went to work he was startled to see all of his employees had orangish-yellow splatters on their heads.
That's when he knew he was special. He could say, or do anything, and they'd support him. It was at this magic moment that Bluto knew he should run for president.
The End
Time for me to walk on down the road...
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