Monday, October 24, 2016

5 Current TV Commercials That Suck Above All Others

Good Day World!

TV is an easy hunting ground for crappy commercials if you follow that sort of thing.

I hate advertising in all of it's sneaky forms, but TV commercials are reserved for my deepest loathing. I hate that they have to be there, or I can't watch a program.

I'm so old I remember when TV was free. Sure, there were only a few channels to watch, but the only cost was a few bucks on your electric bill...oh, and you really needed a good antenna but a metal coathanger could be substitued if necessary.

(in descending order)

#5 that creepy CHEEZ IT ad where some guy talks with a round of cheese and it talks back. It's kind of a surreal moment and you can't help wondering what drug he's tripping on!

#4 that State Farm Insurance ad where two women are standing in a livingroom and talking about a newly purchased sofa. They briefly discuss all of it's good attributes.

Next scene: two criminals have broken into the house (at night) where the new sofa is. They stop and discuss it's merits before stealing it. Really?

#3 that GEICO ad where a couple of kids sit behind a homemade lemonade stand and people walk by saying stupid things.

One woman asks if they have ice tea? (This despite the fact that there's only a lemonade pitcher and glasses on the stand). Oh yea...the sign says lemonade too.

Then a guy who is real creepy (a child molester type of creepy) slowly walks past the kids selling the lemonade - with a sly smile - and asks if they have ice tea?

Finally another woman asks for ice tea? At this time a guy sitting nearby who has been watching them all blows up and shouts lemonade! It's lemonade! The guy is rapper Ice T. (thanks Larry Denayer)

#2 that damn Viagra commercial pushing single doses of the drug for guys with limp dicks. (Are we far from finding them in men's vending machines?)
The woman always look so much younger, and the man shown don't look that old.

She gives this sly smile and slips a pack into her husband/boyfriend's suitcase seemingly thrilled at the idea of get drilled for the next four straight hours (or until the guy dies!)

#1 Pizza Hut has outdone themselves with the worst commercial ever...the "Conspiracy Theorist." 
A guy who strongly resembles a serial killer with a square jaw and hooded eyes walks around in a kitchen where employees are working poking them (get this) to see if they are real!

I kid you not. This guy stumbles around the kitchen poking things (and people) like "Lurch" from the Adams Family, while babbling about some kind of conspiracy like a Trump follower!

Time for me to walk on down the road...

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