The Ig Nobel Prizes: A Sidewise Look at Some Scientist's Silly Research

You may not have heard of this breathtaking scientific study that came out of the Ecole Nationale de Toulouse, France, so I'll share it with you.

Proud researchers have determined which type of flea - the dog flea and the cat flea - can jump higher! How exciting is that? Also, how many millions of dollars were spent to find out that the dog flea is the jumping champion of the animal kingdom? 

The innovative research team was awarded the Annals of Improbable Research's Ig Nobel Prize in 2008 under the biology category. The reward was created by Marc Abrahams to recognize the feats of those who "make people laugh," and then think.

One of my favorite Ig Nobel Award recipients was the team of researchers from the University of Bern whose seminal research paper on Beer vs Human Skull got a lot of attention in 2009.

The big questions were which would cause the most damage? A full or empty beer bottle? And which one would fracture a human skull?

When you stop laughing, I'll continue...

Dr. Stephen Bolliger and his colleagues tested the breaking energy of full and empty bottles using a drop tower. No surprise. The full bottle strikes a target with 70% more energy than an empty one.

Just think what a moment that must have been! The sheer joy of discovery! One more observation; both bottles will fracture a skull.

If you think that was exciting wait till you read about the 2002 research paper by Stefano Ghirlanda, Liselotte Jansson and Magnus Enquist at Stockholm University.

These dedicated devotees of science have answered the age-old question... "Do chickens prefer beautiful humans?

The researchers trained six chickens to "react" to images of ordinary male and female faces. The chickens were tested on a series of images ranging from the average face to a face with exaggerated male and female characteristics.

Surprisingly (maybe not to the chickens) the team claimed they showed preferences for faces consistent with human sexual preferences.

Some other award winners over the years  

** Can Pigeons Tell a Picasso from a Monet? (1995)

** The Nature of Navel Lint (2009)

** The Effects of Cocaine on Bees (2009)

** Fruit Bat Fellatio (2009)

** Does Country Music Make You Suicidal? (1992)

** Do Cabbies Have Bigger Brains? (2011)

** Flatulence as a Self-Defense (1996)

As it Stands, I hope you enjoyed this moment of levity.

Let's Have Some Fun Playing Solve that Trump Mystery

Do you like mysteries?

Do you have fun trying to solve mysteries big and small?

This post is for you.

Today's Mystery

Why did Trump flee from New Jersey Sunday night, and fly to Washington DC?

He was spotted leaving from Morrison Municipal Airport in New Jersey and landing at Washington Dulles International Airport in Virginia. When he got off the plane observers noticed he was looking bedraggled as he disembarked down the stairs.

Even more curious he was still wearing golf shoes and carrying a hat like he was abruptly taken off his golf course in Bedminster.

What was the hurry? And why go to Washington DC, a place he's shunned since getting booted out of office?

Naturally, theories abound like free range rabbits in a no-hunting zone.

1. Trump may have gotten word his club was going to be searched by the FBI and took off like a scared rabbit.

The question still hanging out there like a hanging chad in Florida's infamous presidential recount is why go to Washington DC at all?

2. Trump was going to Walter Reed Medical Center in Bethesda, Maryland for medical reasons.

One question remains with this guess; why he would go that far when he could go to any hospital in the area and have the government pick up the tab?

3. Trump flew to Washington DC to settle for a negotiated self-surrender that involves not going to jail.

I have a problem imagining Trump surrendering to anybody. Journalist Maggie Haberman has a book coming out about how Trump was going to refuse to leave the White House, according to numerous aides.

Does surrendering to anyone sound like our treasonous former president? 

The three guesses above are a consensus of theories trending on Twitter. What do you think?

I've read and heard some pretty crazy guesses coming from Trump's minions, which is of course to be expected. After all there is an alternate universe operating in the country that needs fed.

I think my favorite wacko theory is Trump flew to Washington DC to take over the reins of the government because Joe Biden was exposed as a traitor to the nation. Trump didn't have time to change clothes before answering his country's call.

Back to reality.

One more strange thing I forgot to mention: as of the time I posted this... Trump hasn't said a word on his fake Twitter (Truth) account or anywhere else.

It's just not like Donny to pass up his daily ranting session. Everyone agrees that the whole thing is weird. 

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(NEWS UPDATE: Trump holds private meet with his lawyers at his golf course in Sterling, Virginia. No one brought golf clubs!) 

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As it stands, like any good mystery I expect some entertaining twists and turns before we know the answer.

'Conspiracies R Us' Goes Public: Shares Being Sold in Time for Midterms

What a day for trolls!

After six years of growth in red states "Conspiracies R Us" has officially moved into Wall Street where corruption is rewarded.

According to legal eagles "Conspiracies R Us" was founded in 2016. The founder, Donald. J. Trump had a pipeline into the crazy community (being president and all) and was pumping out rumors and lies daily to his supporters.

His brick-and-mortar stores are full of illustrated books about Trump's humble upbringings and rise to sainthood in Red States. And so much more.

There's a number of reasons why the franchise is growing rapidly, but the scariest is knowing there's millions of wackos who are just discovering "Conspiracies R Us" as they spring up like poisonous toadstools across the country.

Don't quote me here, but I heard a rumor that a new extremist store chain called "The Sedition Corner" is opening up in Florida so its founder Gov. Ron DeSantis can make it his campaign headquarters.  

Meanwhile you're probably wondering what else can be found in "Conspiracies R Us?"

Imagine what troll heaven must look like. Yep. A building with TVs on every wall so Trump minions can listen to old and new conspiracy theories. Rows of computer stations featuring the best of the dark web are discreetly hidden behind curtains. 

Trump's merchandize from T-Shirts to sets of extra-large plastic hands hang from the walls. Posters hailing the return of JFK to coronate King Trump to photo-shopped images of Rambo with Trump's head on top cover the ceiling.

The piped in music ranges from "All Hail Master Trump" to "God Bless His Majesty Trump."

Contributing to the store's popularity is the fact they have special discounts for late night dwellers and stalkers because their open 24 hours a day.

One popular new video displaying Democrats as murderers, pedophiles, and godless creatin's, is now on sale in time for the midterm elections.

Another way the stores create excitement is by having monthly prize drawings for in store shoppers. Last month's prize winner got a scaled down version of Mount Rushmore with Trumps mug added next to Lincoln's head.

Canny stock investors are aware that Trump's foray into the stock market will eventually turn out to be just another pump and dump enterprise following a history of bankruptcies, fraudulent charitable foundations, and a rip-off university that ended up being sued and paying back students.

Despite that, some brokers will buy into the scheme and purchase stock hoping to dump it for a profit before the business inevitably collapses.

As it stands, if you want to raise money for your public campaign to be an elected official just tell your supporters to shop at "Conspiracies R Us" and that you sent them!

American Grifters: From Politicians to Pastors - How Do They Get Away with Ripping People Off?

When I look at the successful grifters in America ripping people off I wonder what the common denominator is that makes people easy fund-raising targets.

Is it blind faith?

Is it naivety?

Is it fear?

Is it stupidity?

Is it because some people live in an alternate reality?

What would you call Trump supporters who send him money whenever he asks for it?

The Department of Justice is investigating Trump's PAC for lying to donors about where their money was going... to a defense fund that didn't even exist! Instead, their hard-earned money was put into a slush account for the greatest grifter in American history.

Trump knows no bounds as demonstrated when he stole top secret files, including one file with nuclear information on another country.

What would you call religious followers who enrich evangelical mega pastors offering tickets to Heaven via donations so they can get an extra jet to travel around in?

You may recall that Osteen was once the center of a scandal where $600,000 dollars that had disappeared from the churches coffers was accidently discovered at Osteen's Houston Church by a plumber fixing a toilet wall.

The plumber told the church leadership about his find. Osteen was questioned by the police about the suspicious concealment of the money, as well as its disappearance in 2014.

In 2014, Houston's Crime Stoppers offered a $25,000 reward for help in locating the money. They still haven't caught the mystery thief. Osteen is still busy grifting. 

Despite being investigated for fraud and worse crimes, grifters like Trump or Joel Osteen  manage to thrive. 

Both are famous con men in their own lanes. Secular and religious. Both abuse power for person gratification. Both continue to lie to their loyal followers despite proof that they're being ripped off.

The above are just two examples - albeit dramatic ones - of how successful grifters are in America today. With the help of the internet, it's become a golden age for grifters.

After looking at as many reasons as I could come up with to explain why people allow themselves to become victims... I still don't understand all of the dynamics involved. Does anyone out there?

As it stands, the greatest friend of con artists is lack of knowledge.

Life is Unprecedented: Get Over It!

I'm tired of hearing how everything is unprecedented lately.

News flash! Life is unprecedented.

Something new happens every day.

Listening to political pundits of all stripes breathlessly describe the unprecedented idea of indicting a president for major crimes against the nation has become tiring.

We've never had a president try to overthrow a national election either. We never had a president who stole top secret nuclear files and took them home with him. We never had a more corrupt president in the republic's history.

All unprecedented.

So why quibble about what'll happen if Trump is indicted and convicted? What will happen if he gets away with those crimes?

I enjoy watching "Morning Joe" host Joe Scarborough even though I don't always agree with him. When Joe agreed with former attorney general Bill Barr that indicting Trump could ultimately do more harm than good my jaw dropped.

Are you kidding me?

Joe warned that indicting Trump will motivate the next Republican administration to indict the next Democratic predecessor.

Say it ain't so Joe... normally you're more clear-headed than that. Did you stop to consider the next Republican regime will go after Democrats like honey badgers no matter what they do while in power?

I agree with what political commentor John Heilemann said on the show.

"I can't believe that you would want to see the other precedent, which is that a president could leave office, steal a bunch of documents, take them to their private home, including top secret nuclear files... and we're going to let that president get away with that?" 

Fact is both are unprecedented. 

As it stands, life is unprecedented... get over it! 

Don't Be Afraid of Letting Your Imagination Run Wild

Do you allow your imagination unfettered access as a means of creating solutions?

Are you aware that a good imagination provides people with hope?

The power of imagination transcends reality sometimes, allowing you to see opportunities for transformation and change you were otherwise missing.

Imagination is magical. Spend time watching a young child play sometime and you will experience firsthand the magic that comes from imagination.

Our imagination has the ability to ignite our passion. As adults we reluctantly work in a world of responsibility and practicality that dictates how we live, breath, and experience life. By dreaming of what could be (instead of what is) it reminds us of what it feels like to be passionate.

What's happened in the 21st century is that we lost the connection to passion and purpose in life and replaced it with survival and responsibility.

The good news is our imagination can create positive changes in our future. When we venture out into our imagination to focus on reality that we want to experience, the energy is set in motion and positive changes can be possible.

When it comes to creative artists and scientists, they have one thing in common; they can think outside the box by allowing their imaginations the freedom to grow and evolve.

Let's face it. Sometimes reality just sucks!

Watching the news and hearing about the violence, crime, sickness, and sadness in the world is enough to make anyone believe that the world is falling apart.

By falling into the trap of "what is" and believing that this is the way the world works, we become victims and relinquish our creative abilities. Choosing to use our imagination as means of creation provides us all with hope.

A very practical genius, Albert Einstein once said, "Imagination is everything. It is the preview for life's coming attractions."

That same stable genius also said, "Reality is an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."

As it stands, realizing that we all have an escape valve and the means to make changes in our lives within us by embracing our imagination is magical.

Memo to Political Pundits: Quit Calling Everything Trump Does a 'Game Changer.'

In the current state of political 

polarization and chaos engulfing the country I keep hearing (and reading) that every time Trump gets caught committing a crime it's a game changer.

If that were the case the game would have been over a long time ago.

The latest hyperbolic claim is Trump is in big trouble because a top-secret nuclear file on another nation was discovered in his beach resort home, Mar-a-Lago.

GAME CHANGER! the headlines and newsrooms have been trumpeting since the Washington Post released the "bombshell" (another word I have issues with) nuke story.

To begin with Trump already has so many charges and cases tied up in court what's one more piece of evidence that will be tied up in the judiciary system for years?

To be clear, nothing in Trump's criminal career as the nation's first Con Man in the Oval Office, was a game changer. The Russia investigation. Two impeachments (something that has never happened to prior presidents), inciting an insurrection in an attempt to steal the 2020 election, and now what?

Espionage, obstruction of justice, and destruction of government files are possible charges floating around at the Department of Justice.

There's simply no good reason to call anything a game changer when it comes to Trump. He works the courts like a mob boss. Because he appointed 223 federal judges during his regime, he expects them to come up big for him when he's dragged into their courts.

Like Judge Cannon (appointed and confirmed days before Trump left office) allowing for a Special Master in the case of the FBI and Trump over government classified and top-secret files.

In essence the judge handed down a decision that had no legal merit because she didn't want to hurt Trump's reputation! 

Pause... I can't stop laughing. What reputation?

You heard that right. It stinks to high heaven while exposing Trump's cronies in higher places like the judicial system. 

This concentrated attempt to overthrow our republic is all just a game for Trump. As a former failed game show host, he knows how to play games with people's minds and emotions.

Political pundits need to understand that there is no one game changer that will put Trump behind bars. It's going to be an accumulative effect of indictments and convictions before that happens.

Now if his final appeal - after multiple convictions - goes to the Supreme Court all bets are off. He appointed three of them just in case he ever had to overturn any charges against him.

Now, their decision would certainly be a game changer for our democracy.

As it stands, hitting a walk-off home run in the 9th inning is a game changer. The term works better with sports.

An Anal Analysis: What Do You Think About Perineum Sunning?

It's no secret (after all it's been around for years) but I'll bet you never heard of tanning your butthole for better health. 

Maybe you have, but in the off case you didn't, read on.

If you're a TikToker you may be aware of Perineum Sunning (sounds official, doesn't it?) because it's trending recently.

The murky origin of the fad involving pointing one's butt and genitals at the sun is suspect because it could be an offshoot of some wellness cult, or just one big fat joke!

Like... "When the mooooon... is in the seventh house... And Uranus... aligns with the Sun...."

Thus far I haven't met someone who admits to tanning their butthole. BUT... I have met Hispanics who confess to bleaching their buttholes. True story. I've been told it's a "beauty" thing and not to worry my little head about it.

Facts: Like opinions everyone has a butthole. There are millions of people running around like rogue buttholes stinking up our society with conspiracies. 

In an era where MAGA politicians have their heads up their buttholes, it's a badge of honor. Better yet, the further they have their heads up Trump's bloated butt the better.

If we're going to talk about buttholes the subject of stink has to come up. Listen... the cure for stinking buttholes is a mainstream subject. 

Who knew? Ads on TV and in publications proudly display little jars of cream that'll make you butthole smell like flowers. Or, whatever.

Back to tanning butts. One thing that comes to mind is getting a sunburned butthole. What level of hell would that put you through?

I'll bet there's Yoga groups and health nuts who greet the rising sun by laying back, raising both legs, and pointing their buttholes skyward. Not a pretty sight but who cares? It's their way of communing with nature.

As it stands, I'll stick to pruning pot plants as my way to commune with nature.

Trump Cults 'Big Lie' Meets Super Joe

Who was that man speaking?

It was the President of the United States.

So, what's happened to soft talking Joe, the grandfatherly figure? 

He's gone. At least for now. His replacement is a grizzled warrior ready to go to war with the enemies of freedom to protect our democracy. Clad with the armor provided by recent favorable ratings in the polls Joe is going on the offensive.

The speech he gave last week in front of Independence Hall was probably the greatest speech he's made since becoming a politician.

No more tiptoeing through the tulips. Joe identified Trump and his cult followers as enemies within America. Clark Kent came out of the phone booth and Super Joe emerged.

It proves you can teach an old dog new tricks. Joe has never been a charismatic politician, but his speeches at Independence Hall and on Labor Day in Wisconsin and Pennsylvania show that he has the "makings" (as my grandmother use to say) of a more dynamic politician than he's previously showed us.

One of the little things I noticed was that Joe paused a little longer to allow the clapping to reach a crescendo. Before he had a bad habit of speaking before the applause subsided. Kudos to his PR team for that adjustment.

Separating mainstream Republicans from MAGA Republicans, Joe drew a straight line between reality and dangerous fiction. 

As President Biden said, "Maga followers don't believe they have to follow the laws of the land and if they lose an election, they respond with violence and conspiracies to overthrow the results." 

It's something mainstream Republicans have never done before. I'll give them that. That in itself should worry the whole country.

"As Joe framed it, we're fighting for the "Soul of the Country." Despite his critics, Biden has been able to pass a lot of important bills in his first two years. 

As it stands, I think the stark contrast between Trump's cult and the rest of mainstream America is going to lead to unexpected wins - not just for the Democrats, but for all Americans - in the midterms. 

I'm Still Waiting For...

I'm still waiting for...

... the return of reality to our society. 

Where alternate universes no longer exist alongside facts.

... the Los Angeles Lakers to become contenders again.

... Ted Cruz to start a campaign against a fictional character - Donald Duck, to try and go one up on Ron DeSantis's rabid attacks against Mickey Mouse.

... Marijuana to be made America's National Plant and have it taken off that stupid Schedule One classification (the highest threat to users) the government has cursed it with.

... NASA to prioritize looking for another planet mankind can escape to before we finish destroying this one. A return to the Moon is beyond stupid.

... Hunter Biden to produce proof that Lindsey Graham and Matt Gaetz have been secretly running a pedophile ring for years.

... Kayleigh McEnany (former Press Secretary for Trump) to tell the truth.

... a renaissance of reason to overcome the political damage, misinformation and outright lies that threaten our entire education system.

... a good reason for treason. Let me know if you can think of one.

... Dennis the Menace to grow up and join the Trumplican Party.

... Godzilla to have a rematch against King Kong whose been claiming their last fight on film was fake.

... Mitch McConnell to retire to the rafters of an old barn somewhere in Kentucky to be with his owl family.

... Trump to finally be held accountable (indicted) for his numerous crimes and convicted in all of them.

As it stands, it's not easy being patient, is it?

Just When You Thought You've Heard Everything: Throwing Bikes into Waterways is a Worldwide Trend

Today we're going to look at the strange trend (on at least three continents) of people tossing their bikes into waterways.

Why? Good question, but no one has the definitive answer. I won't leave you hanging, however. There are different theories why perfectly functional bikes are being tossed into waterways.

Before going any further you could try Googling the phenomena to get additional background into this worldwide trend... or you can settle for a condensed version here by me. 

You can also go on YouTube and listen to people tell you about the satisfaction of watching your bike slip below the surface of the water. Bike tossing videos are hot.

Let's go back to why...

One theory is it's a mass example of vandalism. I wouldn't bet on that one. At best, vandals probably make a limited contribution to the trend.

The fact is bike programs are proliferating across the world. These bike share programs are sponsored by banks or some sort of corporate sponsor with their logos on the mudguards.

Because they're not an individual's bike the share riders have no problem tossing a bike sponsored by a company into the water. It must really be satisfying.

In China people say the reasons they throw bikes into the water are because they violate their privacy. Say what? Apparently, the shared bike programs keep track of their riders with apps on their mobile phone.

Sending the bikes to watery graves is an expression of regaining their freedom. In the 19th century, the bicycle was viewed as an emancipatory machine, a vehicle of liberation that gave them a new kind of mobility.

In Amsterdam, 15,000 bikes are pulled from canals each year. The city is considered one of the world's leading bicycle cities and its numerous canals are the ideal environment for dunking or drowning bicycles. Authorities say it's not unusual for drunks to heave their bikes into the water. 

Beyond that, no one knows why so many bikes are thrown into the waterways. It's so bad that the city has what they call "bicycle fisherman" dredging bicycles out of the canals.

Bike rental businesses in Rome, Italy are simply going out of business because too many of their bicycles were being thrown into the Tiber.

I researched the United States to see if we are going along with this worldwide trend and was unable to find any examples. However, I did find that throwing electric motor bikes into waterways was a thing back in 2019-2020.

As it stands, just when you thought you heard everything, something new always pops up.

Who Else is Sick of Hearing Rumors of War?

Republican lawmakers are spreading rumors of war if our former president is indicted... for any of his crimes.

American military strategists research rumors of war around the world, weighing in if they think the United States needs to get involved as a matter of national security.

In our politics war is a central theme 

War against Women

War on Democracy

War of Words

Another Civil War

War for the soul of America

War against liberals and conservatives

The War against the Deep State

and so forth...

It sure would be nice if everyone could just sit back, take a deep cleansing breath, and leave the word war out of their vocabulary, especially when it comes to heated political arguments.

I'm going to go Biblical on you for a moment and pass on a passage from Matthew 24:3

Jesus's disciples asked him "Tell us... what will be the sign of your coming and the end of the age?"

Jesus responded, "And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars" (Matthew 24-6) ... See that you are not alarmed, for this must take place, but the end is not yet."

My interpretation is, don't worry about what will happen in the future. Live for today because you can't change anything.

So, when we hear these dire rumors and threats of future wars, we need to put them into prospective. Political rhetoric has always been harsh and threatening. While it can lead to a civil war, it doesn't mean we'll have another one.

I realize there are no guarantees in life, but it doesn't mean we should live in fear. Life is too short for that.

As it stands, the good news is we have freedom of choice when it comes to choosing between negative and positive input in our lives.

What Was Your Most Embarrassing Moment?

Let's all just get real and admit we've had humiliating and embarrassing moments in our lives where we wished we were invisible.

I read an article about the parents of one ten-year-old girl who must have wished they were invisible at a Red Lobster Restuarant. Their daughter decided she felt bad for all the lobsters in the tank, took a chair and smashed the tank to free them. Mission accomplished. 

The parents were told not to ever come back again. I'm surprised they weren't sued. 

Can you imagine how embarrassed they must have been tiptoeing around live lobsters on the way out of that restaurant?

Moving on...

One of my favorite embarrassing stories involves my darling wife of 48 years, Shirley. She and two of her friends were driving back to northern California (Eureka) from San Francisco a decade ago when they all needed to stop for a potty break.

They found a shopping center right off the 5 Freeway and went into a store to use their facilities. On the way back to the car, after leisurely stopping and checking items out they were in the parking lot when one of the ladies started laughing...

"You have a toilet paper tail Shirley," she shrieked with laughter while pointing at her bum. My thoroughly humiliated wife will never get to forget that incident because of those two friends... and me!

All right. It's my turn.

Once upon a time I was a sleepwalker (six years old) and it often put me in awkward circumstances. But none were more embarrassing than the night I peed on my birthday cake!

Allow me to explain. My parents and Aunt and Uncle were sitting around the kitchen table and drinking beer long after I went to bed. 

At one point I walked past them and went straight for the refrigerator. Before anyone could react, I opened it, dropped my shorts and sprayed the contents within - which included the remnants of my birthday cake.

My father guided me back (I was still asleep) to my bedroom. From that day on it became family lore. The good news is I'm no longer embarrassed.

The fact is I've had lots of embarrassing moments during my seven decades. I'm strangely proud of them and chalk them up to lessons in life. 

Memories...

--- the time I was at a college journalism awards banquet and took a fork full of baked potato with Horseradish on it (spoiler - I hate Horseradish) and was in the process of spewing it up on the table when my name was called out for writing the best Sports story of the year. Needless to say, all eyes were on me.

--- my first date with Shirley when I took her to a fancy restaurant in Hollywood and was trying to act suave and worldly and almost led her into a janitor's closet instead of the dining room!

--- in high school I went on a surfing double date with a girl in one of my classes along with my sister and her boyfriend (who had a station wagon). I'm not going to bore you with how the date came about. Instead, I'll cut right to the chase...

I was not a surfer. Nor had I ever tried to surf. My sister's boyfriend was a surfer (who lucky for me had an extra surfboard) and said he could teach me how. The bottom line is I wanted to impress my bikini clad date.

As usual, my 16-year-old hubris didn't allow for me to consider that I might look like an ass out in those breakers. 

In record time I wiped out. Again. And again, until the last time when my nose collided under pressure with the tip of the board. Blood spurted out instantly. As I looked out toward the beach, I saw my sister and the girl I wanted to impress laughing they're asses off!

Did I mention it was first and last time she went on a date with me?

Listen.

Try remembering your most embarrassing moments and you may be surprised at your attitude toward them now. The very least that will happen is you'll smile.

As it stands, I believe that we all need to be humiliated at times just to stay real.

Searching for Laughter in a Grim World

It's harder than ever to laugh about something during these grim times of social unrest and increasing climate disasters. That's a given.

The Search for Laughter

Reader's Digest features a monthly section titled, "Laughter is the best medicine." Start your search for humor there.

Experts say that laughter is a great form of stress relief... and that's no joke. It's not going to cure all ailments, but recent research shows the positive things laughter does offer.

A good laugh has great short-term effects. When you start to laugh, it doesn't just lighten your load mentally, it actually induces physical changes in your body. 

Here's a few examples: (Source - Mayo Clinic)

* It stimulates many organs. Laughter enhances your intake of oxygen-rich air, stimulates your heart, lungs and muscles, and increases the endorphins that are released from your brain.

* It activates and relives your stress response. A good hearty laugh fires up and then cools down your stress response, it can increase and then decrease your heart rate and blood pressure. The payoff leaves you feeling relaxed.

* It soothes tension. Laughter can also stimulate circulation and aid muscle relaxation, both of which can help reduce some of the physical symptoms of stress.

Are you afraid you lost your sense of humor or never really had an easy time laughing? Don't worry about it!

Humor can be learned

You can keep humor on your horizon by watching funny TV shows, movies, and reading books and magazines devoted to humor. There're many other ways like going to humorous web sites to get a good chuckle.

I've found that sharing my humorous situations with others quickly strips away my tensions. When you laugh at yourself people are likely to laugh with you. 

A great example would be comedic legend Rodney Dangerfield. I dare you to listen to one of his routines and not laugh so hard you get short of breath!

Okay. It's time to turn the corners of your mouth up into a smile... and then laugh! Even if it feels forced. How do you feel afterwards? Are your muscles less tense? Do you feel more relaxed or even buoyant?

As it stands, it's a wonder that our brains have a built-in stress relief system.

Since When Did We Find Ourselves Having to Defend Reality?

I want to blame Kellyanne Conway for coming up with the alternate reality bullshit that the Republican Party currently embraces.

It's probably not fair because others have used denial of reality as a platform to power. Remember the McCarthy years when he had every American looking for Russian spies under kitchen tables?

Denial of reality, not just in politics, extends to climate deniers who won't admit mankind has turned our environment into a cesspool despite the mounds of evidence proving it. Fact is we've polluted the land and the air we breathe for well over a century. That's reality.

Millions of Americans believe whatever Trump tells them because they're not interested in reality and facts. The cocoon they live in media wise is a protective shield against reality.

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"Don't let someone else's reality become your reality." -Les Brown

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One of my favorite quotes about reality comes from John Lennon, "Reality leaves a lot to the imagination."

I read an article a while back that claims our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, they don't joke and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image.

The part about the inability to tell the difference between reality and imagined thoughts and images, particularly reminds me of Trump's minions. It's scary because it's all of our reality today with a president actively trying to overthrow the government.

Lies are an insult to reality but are used by extremist lawmakers every day in their ultimate quest for power. Evidence is denied in the fact-free world of Trumpist Republicans.

The net result is sane people will still be able to tell the sky is blue and the grass is green regardless of how much ruckus the anti-reality idiots make in our society.  

As it stands, it's a sad fact that we must defend reality and the country.

Confessions of a Basketball Junkie: Escape to Hoop Land

I was introduced to basketball in elementary school during recesses where just shooting the ball was a challenge. There were no rules. Everyone was out for themselves, and it was literally a free-for-all.

Then one year, I think it was my sixth, the school started having free throw contests and handing out 1st through 3rd ribbons which instantly became a status symbol at our school.

When I made 9 out of 10 free throws and won 1st Place, I knew that I'd be playing in the NBA someday. Flash forward... I didn't and never even came close. But I digress.

I didn't play basketball for my high school team. However, I played countless pickup games with friends at available outside basketball courts. My best friend Larry and I played a lot of 2 on 2 pickup games with total strangers.

Once, after dropping LSD (this is a true story), we played a pickup game in an inside basketball court open to the public in La Mirada, California. Our opponents (which we discovered part way into the competition) were off duty cops. They came out like two honey badgers clawing at the ball with a scary intensity which was magnified by tripping on LSD.

Afterwards we agreed that we won at least one game out of the half dozen we played. I think the reason the cops didn't bust us (have you ever seen anyone high on LSD? It's OBVIOUS) is that we provided them with good competition... and laughs. They sure smiled a lot.

Just before I got out of the Army in 1971, I played with the 5th Army 101st MPs, at Ft. MacArthur, California. 

The only other organized team I played with was in 1972 with a city league team (when I worked at Ford Motor Company) in Cleveland, Ohio. At six-feet, two-inches, I was the shortest guy on the team and the only white boy. I think they considered me a good luck mascot.

Fast forward through the decades as my body slowed down from countless pickup games, injuries, and other age related (can you say arthritis?) causes.

I was 67-years old (I'm going on 72) when I took my last shot (a ten-foot jumper) in my last pickup game at the Medford, Oregon YMCA.

What gets me through after being unable to actually play the game I love is I've been a LA Lakers fan for over 60 years. They still take me to a good place in Hoop Land... stirring old memories with the sheer exhilaration and appreciation for the game.

Welcome to America: Living in a Schizophrenic Society

You've probably noticed.

Nothing is clear cut today. 

Reality has been warped by people living in alternate universes where the earth is flat and Jewish space lasers are a thing.

The barriers that once existed between truth and lies has been torn down by extremists seeking to turn our republic into a totalitarian state. (See the Big Lie)

Some Americans are as happy as clams because they're wealthy and are part of the exclusive ruling cast.

Being human (some might argue that description) these elite millionaires and billionaires are always looking to amass more power. Politics has been a lucrative path for them to pursue and poison.

This special rich segment of our society is schizophrenic in their actions. They flip from Philanthropy to Piracy without blinking an eye while attending church.

The commoners (the majority of Americans) are divided into descending financial classes of moderate incomes to the lowest levels of poverty. Politics has also paralyzed common voters along ideological lines like never before.

When I see people living on fixed and lower incomes donate their much-needed money to political con men from Trump to telephone scams it sickens me. 

It's a form of schizophrenic behavior that really needs more studies done (along with recommendations on how to correct it).

There is no American Dream in 2022. The idea that this country is a safe melting pot for people from around the world, has been thoroughly trashed and disproved throughout our history. 

Immigration has been a cauldron of suspicion and hate since we opened our borders after becoming a nation.

Right and wrong have become abstract concepts instead of a firm reality. We are living in a schizophrenic society that proclaims to be the epiphany of democracy. 

As it stands, it doesn't feel that way.

Cannabis Capitalism and the Black Market are Draining Oregon's Water Supplies During Drought

Photo - Oregon resident Jim Belushi talks about the new season of his Cannabis "Reality" show.

As a resident of Oregon, I've watched with dismay as big cannabis companies and groups grow record amounts of marijuana that are contributing to the decline of water in Southern Oregon... which for the record is designated as a drought zone.  

The last couple of years major cannabis corporations have descended upon Oregon like locusts. 

Many "Oregonians" who were legally producing pot couldn't keep up with the massive, organized competition from the Big Marijuana companies who were undercutting them on prices.

Not only has this legal organized marijuana mafia driven jobs away from local Oregonians but they've also re-energized an organized Black Market causing major problems for our environment.

To be clear.

We have this massive water usage by corporate pot farms and recently inspired illegal farmers (most with Mexican cartel connections). 

Illegal grows have returned with a vengeance after a brief two-year hiatus and they're using water (and contaminating it with chemicals) from rivers and streams in state and national forests. It's water desperately needed in this parched land with more wildfires annually.

It's become a no-win situation. I suppose someone could argue the price for cannabis has gone down lately, with pounds going for hundreds of dollars instead of thousands of dollars.

Someone could also argue that with our new climate reality and increasing need for water with rivers, lakes and dams drying up at historic rates the state is in for some real shit in the near future if something doesn't change.

The problem is I think it's too late to turn back the green market's ambitions for Oregon. The companies are too well funded, and we have a dwindling supply of water.

Another thing that makes me mad is watching my favorite plant play a major part in the unfolding drama of fires, a drought, and capitalism gone crazy.

As it stands, this tired old hippie remembers the glory days of Humboldt communes that grew their own cannabis and the emergence of a legendary strain called - Granddaddy Perp.

'The Handmaid's Tale' Was Based on this Active Secret Christain Sect That Amy Coney Barrett Belongs To

Hula had a hit on their hands when they first released "The Handmaid's Tale" on April 26, 2017. 

The fifth season is set to premier on September 14th.

There's a back story to the Emmy Award winning series by Canadian author Margaret Atwood that's not commonly connected to the hit. It should be.

The plot features a dystopian future following a Second American Civil War where a theonomic, totalitarian society subjects fertile women, called "Handmaids," to child-bearing slavery. 

Does this plot sound far-fetched to you? It isn't and I'll tell you why.

Trump supporters and lawmakers are currently involved in taking away a women's right to her own body. When the right-wing leaning Supreme Court overturned Roe v Wade women across America were disenfranchised. 

When Amy Coney Barrett was elevated to the Supreme Court, she brought along her membership in a secretive faith group that believes women's obedience and subservience to men is a key teaching.

The People of Praise was founded 50 years ago by Kevin Ranaghan and its central theme "headship" and the "roles of men and women" continues today. Former members of People of Praise, many of whom are critical of the group's dominance over member's lives, have described the group as calling for complete obedience of women to their husbands. 

Back to Barrett.

During her confirmation Barrett outright lied about challenging Roe v Wade as a precedent, suggesting she'd leave it alone. No surprise. She didn't.

That's because she's part of an overall attempt to reshape our country into a totalitarian state solely ruled by men. Yes, she is a traitor to women and a liar. She's never addressed how the reversal of Roe might affect a woman's life.

Barrett is a sounding-board echoing the People of Praise culture in which she was raised and chosen to remain part of, which emphasizes the importance of childbirth, pregnancy and the abandonment of autonomy and privacy it supposedly entails, as a core part of what it means to be a woman.

An interesting footnote to all of this is the group is not rooted in Catholic tradition (as some have speculated), but rather Kevin Ranaghan's involvement in the 1970s National Men's Shepards Conference, which was co-sponsored by Protestant leaders who believed that men were ordained by God to lead.

One thing is very clear, there's a war against women in America and they need to fight back by voting in the midterms.

He was Reviled for Resisting the Draft: They Stripped Him of His Title, But Not His Legacy

This is a story of one man standing up for his beliefs during a time of terrible strife when the nation was being torn asunder because of the Vietnam conflict.

He was born Cassius Clay on January 17, 1942, in Louisville, Kentucky. Later, he changed his name to Muhammad Ali in accordance with his newly adopted religion - Islam.

He was also arguably the greatest heavyweight boxer of all time. When he chose to be a conscientious objector against the Vietnam draft, public sentiment - already high - turned against him and he was arguably the most hated man in America and received many death threats.

At the trial on June 20, 1967, the jury found Ali guilty after only 21 minutes of deliberation of the criminal offense of violating the Selective Service laws by refusing to be drafted. 

After a Court of Appeals upheld the conviction, the case was reviewed by the U.S. Supreme Court in 1971. On June 28, 1972, the Supreme Court in Clay v United States overturned Ali's conviction by a unanimous 8-0 decision.

The rest is history. Ali is recognized as "The Greatest" professional boxer of all time. He's also known for his work as an activist for equal rights for African Americans.

A lot of people aren't aware that Ali suffered from dyslexia all of his life and had trouble learning. He once quipped, "I'm the Greatest! Not the Smartest!"

A lot of people asked me what I thought about Ali dodging the draft after I returned from Vietnam and Cambodia (1970). I'm sure they expected me to respond like a war hawk, but I chose the way of the dove saying I agreed with Ali's stance. It was his right as an American.

It's never easy to stand up for one's beliefs, especially when you suffer negative consequences for your decision. But it's worth it.

Ali was so revered that his hometown Louisville renamed their airport The Louisville Mohammad Ali International Airport.

Not bad for a man who was once called the "most hated man" in America.

As it stands, when Ali died on June 2, 2016, the world mourned his loss.