Here's a Last-Minute Christmas Gift Guide for the Republicans in Your Life

So, you waited until days before Christmas to get that Republican in your life a gift ... and you still don't have any idea what to get them.

Don't panic.

First off you need to identify which wing of the Republican party your family member, friend, and people you work with belong too. 

There's the wacko wing featuring twice impeached former president Trump and minions, and there's the traditional conservative's wing.

Easy ways to spot which wing they belong too:

-- Trump wingers wear red caps with MAGA on them, and love to cosplay and dress up in red-white-and blue foolery emblazoned with Trump's mug.

-- The conservative wing dresses normally and avoids looking like clowns.

Listen carefully to their words

-- When every other word is a lie, and they seek to warp reality with conspiracies you know they are in the Trump Wing.

--The Conservative Wing has their share of liars, but they can tell fact from fiction... even though they may do it reluctantly. 

Gift Guide ideas for the Trump Wing

--A month's supply of COVID-19 busters hydroxychloroquine and ivermectin.

--Trump's Coffee Table book that features lots of bigly photos and very little words.

--A booklet of Grift Tickets giving the bearer an inside track on Trump's next grift.

--Stocking stuffers like miniature Trump Golden Idol earrings and cans of orange face makeup.

Gift Guide for the Conservative Wing

--Gift certificates for a free spinal implant.

--Plaques with inspirational messages by Newt Gingrich, Richard Nixon, and Joseph McCarthy.

--A subscription to The Good Old Days monthly magazine featuring stories about how Asians, Blacks and Hispanics knew their place in life.

--A copy of Adam Kinzinger's biography. 

I know it's a short list but it's the best I could do in a limited time. 

As it stands, peace on earth and may the Republican party go back to the days before Trump when they were just idiots and not seditionists.