Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Having a Good Time: Dogs Dating Online

Good Day World!
Have you noticed? Our world gets weirder every day.

 With help from the web, weirdness gets a boost like never before in history. 

 "Extreme” is a key word that will take you down countless paths in cyberspace. Everything is extreme now, or it isn’t worth bothering with. 

There’s extreme snorkeling, sky diving, bowling, beauty contests, game shows, hamburgers, mixed drinks, t-shirts, bathing suits, hair styles, vacations, and so on.

There’s so much extreme weirdness going on that I have to narrow it down to one category due to space constraints.  It has to do with animals. And the people who love them. And the things pet owners do that make you doubt their sanity.

What we have is a tale (pun intended) of pet owners who think providing online dating services for their pets is perfectly normal. 

I wouldn’t kid you about this. Check out Matchpuppy. It offers a brand new way for owner and dogs to meet new friends in the neighborhood, according to the site's homepage.

I must say, Matchpuppy tickles my funny bone. It’s a place where dogs get paired off according to their size, age and energy level.

Speaking on behalf of my single female pug Molly, she’d never subject herself  to such a desperate way to get a date! Meeting nose- to-nose is fine, but the cautious canine shouldn’t trust a stranger online. 

There are always those “bad dogs” who like to have a good time rubbing up against legs, tables, and anything that doesn’t move away from their arduous attempts at satisfaction.

One more thing, what about the owners? What are they supposed to do if their dogs hit it off instantly (as they often do) and the owners don’t?

Will the owners have a little waiting room with a TV if conversation gets too awkward? What kind of magazines would they find there? Doggie porn directories for owners? Nothing is too good for Fido nowadays.

Yes, I’m a pet owner, and I love my pug, but even I have limits, or shall we say, moments of clarity when I realize enough is enough.

I don’t have any problem with pet owners who dress their dogs up in ridiculous outfits, but my pug would leave home if I tried to dress her up in tutus!

You know what’ll happen if these new doggie dating websites really become popular? Reality TV. Can’t you see it? 

One show could be like the old “Dating Game,” where three eligible bachelor pooches wait behind a screen, and answer questions asked by a single female (not B***H because it has to be politically correct to say). 

Even weirdness has its limits.

The latest trend for fashionable canines is tattoos, but I’m not even going there!

Time for me to walk on down the road...

1 comment:

ImBlogCrazy said...

Thanks Michael, but I'm happily married.

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