Don't Read This Unless You Have a Sense of Humor

Good Day World!

I see you checked in, so I'm guessing you have a sense of humor. Enjoy!

Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Student: "Meat!"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"
Student: "Bacon!"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
Student: "Homework!"
Source: Laugh factory

* My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face!
Source: Laugh factory

* A recent worldwide survey showed that out of 2,146,703,436 people, 94% were too lazy to actually read that number.
Source: Laugh factory

In the world of politics...

* When asked if they would have sex with Bill Clinton, 86% of women in D.C. said, "Not again."
  Source: Laugh factory

* Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100? 
   A: Your Honor. 
   Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50? 
   A: Senator.

Source: Laugh factory

* If con is the opposite of pro, then is Congress the opposite of progress?

 Source: Laugh factory

Other jokes...

Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 + 5 on a calculator? 
A: She couldn't find the "10" button.

Source: Laugh factory

What is the definition of a good tax accountant?

Someone who has a loophole named after him. 
source: http://www.jokes4us.com/peoplejokes/accountantsjokes/index.html

Q:What did Ann Coulter's attorney say at her sanity hearing?
A: So.....where do I start?
source: http://www.jokes4us.com/celebrityjokes/anncoulterjokes.html

Time for me to walk on down the road...