Thursday, July 9, 2026

A Mitch McConnell Mystery: Is He Dead or Kicking Back in a Hospital Bed?

I would love to see Mickey Spillane's take on the McConnell mystery.
 
The famous crime novelist has been called the "king of pulp fiction" and is best known for his character Mike Hammer.

What would Hammer say about the longtime senator's silence? His investigation would begin with McConnell's sudden hospitalization on June 14th when he was found unconscious in his home and reportedly suffered a cardiac arrest. No one has heard from him since.

McConnell's staff keeps claiming the 84-year-old is "continuing to improve." That's it. No evidence. On Wednesday two top Republicans, Senate Majority Leader John Thune and Sen. John Barrasso claimed they actually talked with McConnell on the phone for 20 minutes each. "He's eager to come back to the Senate," both men assured reporters.

Hammer would have called bullshit on both Trump cronies. For starters he'd ask why McConnell can't speak to the press if he was able to hold two twenty minutes conversations with his fellow senator's? You know. Proof of life. Not another MAGAified cultist who is trying to hide something.

Even Kentucky's governor publicly asked McConnell to share his health status. 

On top of Hammer's list would be the suspicion that the ruling regime is trying to avoid any political insatiability. Under Kentucky law, if a Senate vacancy occurs, the governor cannot directly appoint a replacement. That means a special election must be held. MAGA is afraid it could lead to a long, drawn-out political or legal fight.

Hammer would also have known the critical date of Aug 3 is approaching. If McConnell is dead, brain dead, or otherwise not able to continue to serve, they have to turn his resignation in to the Senate. That means a special election where MAGA fears ousted congressman Thomas Massie could win it.

However, Mike Hammer, being an inquisitive sleuth, would have delved deeper into the mystery. Like why McConnell's wife Elaine Chao decided to go to China three days after her husband's hospitalization? It seems odd for a loving wife. She met with Chinese Vice President Han Zheng on June 17 in Beijing according to Chinese state media service Xinhua. What they really talked about is anyone's guess.

Why was Chao, who plays no role in the government, there to suddenly talk about "further efforts to strengthen the relationship between the U.S. and China?"  Hammer would have noted Chao had a good relationship with the Chinese elite and urged her husband to make concessions to the Communist nation for decades.

As it Stands, it doesn't just take a fictional character to suspect something's rotten in MAGA land. The truth is out there.

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A Mitch McConnell Mystery: Is He Dead or Kicking Back in a Hospital Bed?

I would love to see Mickey Spillane's take on the McConnell mystery.   The famous crime novelist has been called the "king of pulp ...