Solving the Mystery of the Missing Bird Penises

It's a mystery Sherlock Holmes would have refused to take on with his Victorian principals, but modern scientific sleuths have no bones about solving the mystery of the missing bird penises.

Before I turn you lose on the following article, which by the way will probably weird you out, I think it's safe to say most people will be surprised at how well-endowed some birds are.

Like ducks for example. Wow! Who would have guessed? I have a whole new respect for Donald Duck and Daffy Duck now.

"In the animal kingdom, ducks and geese are famous for their extra-long penises. 

In fact, when extended, the Argentine Lake Duck (photo above) is longer than the bird itself.

Most birds don't have such bragging rights, however. 

Males in 97 percent of the bird species have tiny penises or lack them entirely!

 Instead, they shoot sperm into a female body through an exit called a cloaca.

The absent bird penis is a head-scratcher for scientists who study animal reproduction. For animals in which eggs are fertilized inside the female body, sperm have a better chance of getting through if they're pipe-delivered with easy reach.

Why lose an organ that seems so important to achieve this task?" asked Patricia Brennan, a researcher at the University of Maryland who studies the coiled duck penis in an email to NBC News in 2013.

Why indeed?

I'll be honest with you... studying bird boners is a strange way to make a living. I don't care what anyone says. I can think of other species that would be more appropriate to research but that would be a future post.

I posted this story in April of 2013 and thought it would be fun to revisit it again in April of 2025. After all, what other species on this planet has a month dedicated to their genitals?

As it Stands, this is a strange world we live in but it's all we've got! Time for me to walk on down the road.