Tuesday, January 17, 2017

White House Renovations Raise Eyebrows But Tough Sh*t!

                                           Good Day World!

January 21st - Americans are still in shock.

No one could of imagined that Donald Trump would remodel the entire White House in such a short time.

Dump tweeted about the progress as each new gold fixture was installed in the bathrooms and the main kitchen. Perhaps one of the most controversial changes he made was adding another floor.

When asked by the press why the extra floor, Trump explained that the top floor was for Barron, his spoiled 9-year old who enjoys telling his classmates "Your fired!"

"It's what he grew up with in Trump Tower. He has his own floor there," the new president noted. "When Barron and Melanie move in after his school term in New York, they're both going to feel at home." 

Meanwhile American historians cried when the Oval Office was remodeled and turned into a tiny golf course complete with racks of tiny golf clubs designed to fit Trump's small hands.

No one was particularly surprised when all of the paintings of past presidents came down and were replaced by paintings of Trump in a variety of imperial poses.

Some eyebrows were raised when Trump's daughter Ivanka immediately moved in with Daddy and assumed Melania's position of First Lady. 

It took a lot of threats before the Republican dominated House and Senate agreed to capitulate to his demand of having a gold-plated statue of himself put in the front of the redesigned White House.

Trump's new intelligence directors wasted no time in preparing a secret room for Putin and Trump to have sexual liaisons when the Russian dictator made state visits. 

Really though...no one should be surprised by the changes. For those of you who didn't vote for Trump and don't like them there's not a damn thing you can do.

For those who did vote for Chump, and don't like the changes to the White House Trump House...tough shit!

The Trump House is here to stay...for four years (unless he's impeached, tarred and feathered, and tried for treason).

Time for me to walk on down the road...

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