Never Ending Story: Yeet! American Dictionary Grows Every Year

Linguistic scholars generally agree Mandarin and English are two of the toughest languages in the world to learn.

Rather than go into the multiple reasons why let's focus in on the English language and why I think it's tougher than Mandarin... for one big reason.

We annually add words and phrases to our dictionaries making it nearly impossible to keep up with Mirriam-Webster's continual additions. I'm still waiting for Trumpism to slink into our lexicon.

The good news is that many of those new words and phrases can be amusing, inspirational and even provoke debate.

This year 370 words and phrases were added. Here's three of my favorite words:

** Yeet - it either means "used to express surprise, approval, and excited enthusiasm," or as a verb it means "to throw especially with force and without regard for the thing being thrown."

** Shrinkflation - is now a household word thanks to a newspaper publisher from Massachusetts who defined the word as "the practice of reducing a product's amount of volume per unit while continuing to offer it at the same price."

**Adorkable - combine dorky and adorable and you have "socially awkward or quirky in a way that is endearing."

ICYMI which is short for "in case you missed it" also made the cut this year. Finding out that Pumpkin Spice was just added surprised me somewhat. I would have thought it made the cut a long time ago.

According to Merriam Webster's editor at large, "Words offer a window into our ever-changing language and culture and are only added to the dictionary when there is clear and sustained evidence of use."

As it stands, if that's true, why hasn't Trumpism been added yet? It's been around for years? I'm suspicious of their methodology.

Pet Bills in Congress Not Likely to Pass Anytime Soon Unless Animals Given the Right to Vote

Democrats and Republicans love animals.

 

Bipartisan support for their welfare is commonplace. 

Just don't expect any legislation to slide through Congress soon.

Meanwhile...

California Rep. Tony Cardenas is going to host a meet-and-greet with some of the beagles rescued from Virginia to highlight his proposed bill, the Companion Animal Release from Experiments (CARE) Act.

The bill requires NIH-funded research facilities to implement post-adoption policies for dogs, cats and rabbits.

I suspect it will pass through Congress without any notable friction if they ever bring the bill up. But that's the problem. There are five other well-meaning animal bills that are sitting on the bottom of future bills yet to be considered.

* The Planning for Animal Wellness Act

* Right Whale Coexistence Act

* The Shark Fin Sales Elimination Act

* The Big Cat Safety Act

and

* The Beat Poaching Elimination Act

It's obvious (to me) that animals don't vote in the midterms, or those bills might have garnered some consideration. 

Which leads to my proposal of allowing animals to vote using a system where their owners are their proxies and will be allowed to fill out all forms and cast a ballot.

Imagine what a pet friendly nation we'll become after introducing such progressive legislation?

My dogs Molly and Butters think it's a great idea.

As it stands, the idea of electing pets puts a real interesting spin on future elections - Elect Fido and Get Free Bones with Meat still on them! 

Political Plants Put the Garden of Democracy in Peril

According to Biblical accounts a snake (representing the devil) slithered into the Garden of Eden and tempted Eve to take a bite out of a forbidden apple. She did. After that everything went to hell in a handbasket.

More than one snake has slithered into America's Garden of Democracy threatening the republic.

Right-wing extremists like Trump and his supporters, seeded Congress, federal judge ships, and state political positions for years with upcoming wackos loyal to a totalitarian rule. Now in full bloom the deadly plants are invading the American political landscape.

Like unwanted weeds MAGA morons are running for more political offices than ever before. The general feeling being there's enough MAGA gardeners right now to nurture the spread of Trumpism and to overthrow democracy.

For the sake of our nation's future the spread of misinformation from these political plants has to be exposed and dealt with by the Department of Justice.

That fight is in progress.

How far the investigations go will have a lot to do with the midterms. If the Democrats hold Congress, the chance of cleaning our Democratic Garden greatly improves.

If the Democrats only keep the Senate but loose the House, MAGA gardeners will be able to spread their seeds of sedition even further.

Some of the current full-grown MAGA plants in Congress are facing investigations into their roles in the Jan. 6 coup attempt. Others will have to fight off being pulled from Congress in the Fall midterms by motivated Democratic voters.

As it stands, historically Americans have had to defend our Garden of Democracy against multiple enemies. The good news is we're still here tending to the Garden.

Can We Just Get Past Mourning for a British Monarch?

Why are all the major US news organizations covering the death of Queen Elizabeth in such fawning detail?

With everything happening in America today we're being dish fed massive TV coverage highlighting the hauling of the old gal's body around for endless ceremonies. The actual funeral isn't even until next week.

Pause.

Didn't we fight a war of independence and break away from the overbearing monarchy across the sea? The last thing Americans wanted to see was a monarchy. Democracy overcame the British monarchy, and we were freed of all that royal bullshit.

Yet here we are in 2022 mourning the loss of a monarch like it's the most important thing for Americans to pay attention to despite upcoming midterms and countless lawsuits against a former president intent on destroying democracy.

This fascination for English royals is especially stupid today because the whole family are cretins born with silver spoons in their tight lips. 

Think about it. You have an accused pedophile prince and his brother, a cranky and eccentric King who accepted suitcases and bags stuffed with $3.2 million in cash from the former prime minister of Qatar, and who has millions stashed in offshore accounts.

We can't forget the queen's late husband Prince Philip, who died in 2021, was notorious for making racists and sexist remarks. He described Beijing, for example, as "ghastly" during a 1986 visit and told British students "If you stay here much longer, you'll all be slitty eyed."

Lest we forget monarchy obscures the crimes of empire and wraps them in nostalgia.

Those Americans glued to their TVs waiting to see who gets the late queen's Corgis are a mystery to me. I'll admit it.

One passing thought I had was that after the Revolutionary War there were a lot of British loyalists who stayed in the colonies. Perhaps today's royal followers in the US are descendants of theirs.

I also believe that when we allied with England during World War I and II a lot of cross continent marriages occurred possibly adding to the goodwill we see today between the two countries.

None of the above fully explains the mind-numbing coverage devoted to the queen's death and ascension of their new king, who by the way, I suspect isn't going to be a popular monarch.

As it stands, all of that pomp and pageantry is a mere puffery trying to preserve another time in history.

The Ig Nobel Prizes: A Sidewise Look at Some Scientist's Silly Research

You may not have heard of this breathtaking scientific study that came out of the Ecole Nationale de Toulouse, France, so I'll share it with you.

Proud researchers have determined which type of flea - the dog flea and the cat flea - can jump higher! How exciting is that? Also, how many millions of dollars were spent to find out that the dog flea is the jumping champion of the animal kingdom? 

The innovative research team was awarded the Annals of Improbable Research's Ig Nobel Prize in 2008 under the biology category. The reward was created by Marc Abrahams to recognize the feats of those who "make people laugh," and then think.

One of my favorite Ig Nobel Award recipients was the team of researchers from the University of Bern whose seminal research paper on Beer vs Human Skull got a lot of attention in 2009.

The big questions were which would cause the most damage? A full or empty beer bottle? And which one would fracture a human skull?

When you stop laughing, I'll continue...

Dr. Stephen Bolliger and his colleagues tested the breaking energy of full and empty bottles using a drop tower. No surprise. The full bottle strikes a target with 70% more energy than an empty one.

Just think what a moment that must have been! The sheer joy of discovery! One more observation; both bottles will fracture a skull.

If you think that was exciting wait till you read about the 2002 research paper by Stefano Ghirlanda, Liselotte Jansson and Magnus Enquist at Stockholm University.

These dedicated devotees of science have answered the age-old question... "Do chickens prefer beautiful humans?

The researchers trained six chickens to "react" to images of ordinary male and female faces. The chickens were tested on a series of images ranging from the average face to a face with exaggerated male and female characteristics.

Surprisingly (maybe not to the chickens) the team claimed they showed preferences for faces consistent with human sexual preferences.

Some other award winners over the years  

** Can Pigeons Tell a Picasso from a Monet? (1995)

** The Nature of Navel Lint (2009)

** The Effects of Cocaine on Bees (2009)

** Fruit Bat Fellatio (2009)

** Does Country Music Make You Suicidal? (1992)

** Do Cabbies Have Bigger Brains? (2011)

** Flatulence as a Self-Defense (1996)

As it Stands, I hope you enjoyed this moment of levity.

Let's Have Some Fun Playing Solve that Trump Mystery

Do you like mysteries?

Do you have fun trying to solve mysteries big and small?

This post is for you.

Today's Mystery

Why did Trump flee from New Jersey Sunday night, and fly to Washington DC?

He was spotted leaving from Morrison Municipal Airport in New Jersey and landing at Washington Dulles International Airport in Virginia. When he got off the plane observers noticed he was looking bedraggled as he disembarked down the stairs.

Even more curious he was still wearing golf shoes and carrying a hat like he was abruptly taken off his golf course in Bedminster.

What was the hurry? And why go to Washington DC, a place he's shunned since getting booted out of office?

Naturally, theories abound like free range rabbits in a no-hunting zone.

1. Trump may have gotten word his club was going to be searched by the FBI and took off like a scared rabbit.

The question still hanging out there like a hanging chad in Florida's infamous presidential recount is why go to Washington DC at all?

2. Trump was going to Walter Reed Medical Center in Bethesda, Maryland for medical reasons.

One question remains with this guess; why he would go that far when he could go to any hospital in the area and have the government pick up the tab?

3. Trump flew to Washington DC to settle for a negotiated self-surrender that involves not going to jail.

I have a problem imagining Trump surrendering to anybody. Journalist Maggie Haberman has a book coming out about how Trump was going to refuse to leave the White House, according to numerous aides.

Does surrendering to anyone sound like our treasonous former president? 

The three guesses above are a consensus of theories trending on Twitter. What do you think?

I've read and heard some pretty crazy guesses coming from Trump's minions, which is of course to be expected. After all there is an alternate universe operating in the country that needs fed.

I think my favorite wacko theory is Trump flew to Washington DC to take over the reins of the government because Joe Biden was exposed as a traitor to the nation. Trump didn't have time to change clothes before answering his country's call.

Back to reality.

One more strange thing I forgot to mention: as of the time I posted this... Trump hasn't said a word on his fake Twitter (Truth) account or anywhere else.

It's just not like Donny to pass up his daily ranting session. Everyone agrees that the whole thing is weird. 

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(NEWS UPDATE: Trump holds private meet with his lawyers at his golf course in Sterling, Virginia. No one brought golf clubs!) 

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As it stands, like any good mystery I expect some entertaining twists and turns before we know the answer.

'Conspiracies R Us' Goes Public: Shares Being Sold in Time for Midterms

What a day for trolls!

After six years of growth in red states "Conspiracies R Us" has officially moved into Wall Street where corruption is rewarded.

According to legal eagles "Conspiracies R Us" was founded in 2016. The founder, Donald. J. Trump had a pipeline into the crazy community (being president and all) and was pumping out rumors and lies daily to his supporters.

His brick-and-mortar stores are full of illustrated books about Trump's humble upbringings and rise to sainthood in Red States. And so much more.

There's a number of reasons why the franchise is growing rapidly, but the scariest is knowing there's millions of wackos who are just discovering "Conspiracies R Us" as they spring up like poisonous toadstools across the country.

Don't quote me here, but I heard a rumor that a new extremist store chain called "The Sedition Corner" is opening up in Florida so its founder Gov. Ron DeSantis can make it his campaign headquarters.  

Meanwhile you're probably wondering what else can be found in "Conspiracies R Us?"

Imagine what troll heaven must look like. Yep. A building with TVs on every wall so Trump minions can listen to old and new conspiracy theories. Rows of computer stations featuring the best of the dark web are discreetly hidden behind curtains. 

Trump's merchandize from T-Shirts to sets of extra-large plastic hands hang from the walls. Posters hailing the return of JFK to coronate King Trump to photo-shopped images of Rambo with Trump's head on top cover the ceiling.

The piped in music ranges from "All Hail Master Trump" to "God Bless His Majesty Trump."

Contributing to the store's popularity is the fact they have special discounts for late night dwellers and stalkers because their open 24 hours a day.

One popular new video displaying Democrats as murderers, pedophiles, and godless creatin's, is now on sale in time for the midterm elections.

Another way the stores create excitement is by having monthly prize drawings for in store shoppers. Last month's prize winner got a scaled down version of Mount Rushmore with Trumps mug added next to Lincoln's head.

Canny stock investors are aware that Trump's foray into the stock market will eventually turn out to be just another pump and dump enterprise following a history of bankruptcies, fraudulent charitable foundations, and a rip-off university that ended up being sued and paying back students.

Despite that, some brokers will buy into the scheme and purchase stock hoping to dump it for a profit before the business inevitably collapses.

As it stands, if you want to raise money for your public campaign to be an elected official just tell your supporters to shop at "Conspiracies R Us" and that you sent them!

American Grifters: From Politicians to Pastors - How Do They Get Away with Ripping People Off?

When I look at the successful grifters in America ripping people off I wonder what the common denominator is that makes people easy fund-raising targets.

Is it blind faith?

Is it naivety?

Is it fear?

Is it stupidity?

Is it because some people live in an alternate reality?

What would you call Trump supporters who send him money whenever he asks for it?

The Department of Justice is investigating Trump's PAC for lying to donors about where their money was going... to a defense fund that didn't even exist! Instead, their hard-earned money was put into a slush account for the greatest grifter in American history.

Trump knows no bounds as demonstrated when he stole top secret files, including one file with nuclear information on another country.

What would you call religious followers who enrich evangelical mega pastors offering tickets to Heaven via donations so they can get an extra jet to travel around in?

You may recall that Osteen was once the center of a scandal where $600,000 dollars that had disappeared from the churches coffers was accidently discovered at Osteen's Houston Church by a plumber fixing a toilet wall.

The plumber told the church leadership about his find. Osteen was questioned by the police about the suspicious concealment of the money, as well as its disappearance in 2014.

In 2014, Houston's Crime Stoppers offered a $25,000 reward for help in locating the money. They still haven't caught the mystery thief. Osteen is still busy grifting. 

Despite being investigated for fraud and worse crimes, grifters like Trump or Joel Osteen  manage to thrive. 

Both are famous con men in their own lanes. Secular and religious. Both abuse power for person gratification. Both continue to lie to their loyal followers despite proof that they're being ripped off.

The above are just two examples - albeit dramatic ones - of how successful grifters are in America today. With the help of the internet, it's become a golden age for grifters.

After looking at as many reasons as I could come up with to explain why people allow themselves to become victims... I still don't understand all of the dynamics involved. Does anyone out there?

As it stands, the greatest friend of con artists is lack of knowledge.

Life is Unprecedented: Get Over It!

I'm tired of hearing how everything is unprecedented lately.

News flash! Life is unprecedented.

Something new happens every day.

Listening to political pundits of all stripes breathlessly describe the unprecedented idea of indicting a president for major crimes against the nation has become tiring.

We've never had a president try to overthrow a national election either. We never had a president who stole top secret nuclear files and took them home with him. We never had a more corrupt president in the republic's history.

All unprecedented.

So why quibble about what'll happen if Trump is indicted and convicted? What will happen if he gets away with those crimes?

I enjoy watching "Morning Joe" host Joe Scarborough even though I don't always agree with him. When Joe agreed with former attorney general Bill Barr that indicting Trump could ultimately do more harm than good my jaw dropped.

Are you kidding me?

Joe warned that indicting Trump will motivate the next Republican administration to indict the next Democratic predecessor.

Say it ain't so Joe... normally you're more clear-headed than that. Did you stop to consider the next Republican regime will go after Democrats like honey badgers no matter what they do while in power?

I agree with what political commentor John Heilemann said on the show.

"I can't believe that you would want to see the other precedent, which is that a president could leave office, steal a bunch of documents, take them to their private home, including top secret nuclear files... and we're going to let that president get away with that?" 

Fact is both are unprecedented. 

As it stands, life is unprecedented... get over it! 

Don't Be Afraid of Letting Your Imagination Run Wild

Do you allow your imagination unfettered access as a means of creating solutions?

Are you aware that a good imagination provides people with hope?

The power of imagination transcends reality sometimes, allowing you to see opportunities for transformation and change you were otherwise missing.

Imagination is magical. Spend time watching a young child play sometime and you will experience firsthand the magic that comes from imagination.

Our imagination has the ability to ignite our passion. As adults we reluctantly work in a world of responsibility and practicality that dictates how we live, breath, and experience life. By dreaming of what could be (instead of what is) it reminds us of what it feels like to be passionate.

What's happened in the 21st century is that we lost the connection to passion and purpose in life and replaced it with survival and responsibility.

The good news is our imagination can create positive changes in our future. When we venture out into our imagination to focus on reality that we want to experience, the energy is set in motion and positive changes can be possible.

When it comes to creative artists and scientists, they have one thing in common; they can think outside the box by allowing their imaginations the freedom to grow and evolve.

Let's face it. Sometimes reality just sucks!

Watching the news and hearing about the violence, crime, sickness, and sadness in the world is enough to make anyone believe that the world is falling apart.

By falling into the trap of "what is" and believing that this is the way the world works, we become victims and relinquish our creative abilities. Choosing to use our imagination as means of creation provides us all with hope.

A very practical genius, Albert Einstein once said, "Imagination is everything. It is the preview for life's coming attractions."

That same stable genius also said, "Reality is an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."

As it stands, realizing that we all have an escape valve and the means to make changes in our lives within us by embracing our imagination is magical.

Memo to Political Pundits: Quit Calling Everything Trump Does a 'Game Changer.'

In the current state of political 

polarization and chaos engulfing the country I keep hearing (and reading) that every time Trump gets caught committing a crime it's a game changer.

If that were the case the game would have been over a long time ago.

The latest hyperbolic claim is Trump is in big trouble because a top-secret nuclear file on another nation was discovered in his beach resort home, Mar-a-Lago.

GAME CHANGER! the headlines and newsrooms have been trumpeting since the Washington Post released the "bombshell" (another word I have issues with) nuke story.

To begin with Trump already has so many charges and cases tied up in court what's one more piece of evidence that will be tied up in the judiciary system for years?

To be clear, nothing in Trump's criminal career as the nation's first Con Man in the Oval Office, was a game changer. The Russia investigation. Two impeachments (something that has never happened to prior presidents), inciting an insurrection in an attempt to steal the 2020 election, and now what?

Espionage, obstruction of justice, and destruction of government files are possible charges floating around at the Department of Justice.

There's simply no good reason to call anything a game changer when it comes to Trump. He works the courts like a mob boss. Because he appointed 223 federal judges during his regime, he expects them to come up big for him when he's dragged into their courts.

Like Judge Cannon (appointed and confirmed days before Trump left office) allowing for a Special Master in the case of the FBI and Trump over government classified and top-secret files.

In essence the judge handed down a decision that had no legal merit because she didn't want to hurt Trump's reputation! 

Pause... I can't stop laughing. What reputation?

You heard that right. It stinks to high heaven while exposing Trump's cronies in higher places like the judicial system. 

This concentrated attempt to overthrow our republic is all just a game for Trump. As a former failed game show host, he knows how to play games with people's minds and emotions.

Political pundits need to understand that there is no one game changer that will put Trump behind bars. It's going to be an accumulative effect of indictments and convictions before that happens.

Now if his final appeal - after multiple convictions - goes to the Supreme Court all bets are off. He appointed three of them just in case he ever had to overturn any charges against him.

Now, their decision would certainly be a game changer for our democracy.

As it stands, hitting a walk-off home run in the 9th inning is a game changer. The term works better with sports.