Monday, February 20, 2012

Watch out McDonalds: Culture Burgers are on the horizon…

            Good Day Humboldt County!

 Are you ready to walk down a trail that promises to lead you into the future of food in America? Fair warning: It might not be pretty.

Don’t like the idea of killing animals, but have a soft spot for a good beef hamburger? I’ve got news for you, and for vegetarians: the first-ever Culture Dish Hamburger is going to be taste-tested by a world celebrity taster.

If you want to be crass about about it, this unique hamburger cost $330,000 to make. It’s funded by an anonymous investor reportedly interested in “life-transforming technologies." Someone out there is rubbing his hands together in anticipation of revolutionizing the food industry.

According to this news source:

“The patty will be much like a regular quarter-pounder — but with one big difference: This one will be created by growing bovine stem cells in a vat, transforming them into thousands of thin layers of beef muscle cells, mincing them into tiny pieces, then combining the bits with lab-grown animal fat to form a lump of meat the size of a golf ball.”

Yum Yum… doesn’t that sound tasty? (As I try to keep from gagging) Culture Burgers. Somehow they lack the pizazz of cheeseburgers, don’t you think?

More about the future of food:

Time for me to walk on down the road…

2 comments:

Steve Lewis said...

Personally, I'm waiting for Shmoos to be taken off the endangered species list.

"The Shmoo Biography

The SHMOO first appeared in "Li'l Abner" in August 1948. They were a seeming miracle. The lovable creature laid eggs, gave milk and died of sheer ecstasy whenThe SHMOO not SCHMOO looked at with hunger. The Shmoo loved to be eaten by humans and tasted like any food desired. Anything that delighted people delighted a Shmoo. Fry a Shmoo and it came out chicken. Broil it and it came out steak. Shmoo eyes made terrific suspender buttons. The hide of the Shmoo if cut thin made fine leather and if cut thick made the best lumber. Even the Shmoo's whiskers made splendid toothpicks. The Shmoo satisfied all the world's wants. You could never run out of Shmoon (plural of Shmoo) because they multiplied at such an incredible rate. The Shmoo believed that the only way to happiness was to bring happiness to others. Li'l Abner discovered Shmoos when he ventured into the forbidden Valley of the Shmoon, against the frantic protestations of Ol' Man Mose. "Shmoos," Mose warned, "is the greatest menace to hoomanity th' world has evah known." "Thass becuz they is so bad, huh?" asked Li'l Abner. "No, stupid," answered Mose, hurling one of life's profoundest paradoxes at Li'l Abner. "It's because they're so good!"

Ironically, the lovable and selfless Shmoos ultimately brought misery to humankind because people with a limitless supply of self-sacrificing Shmoos stopped working and society began to break down. Seen at first as a boon to humankind, they were ultimately hunted down and exterminated by the U.S. government to preserve the status quo. (Thought extinct after the 1948 adventure, one Shmoo always seemed to escape to Dogpatch's Valley of the Shmoon to form a new colony and the basis for a later plot revival by creator Al Capp). There was even a green-colored evil version of the Shmoo called a Nogoodnik."

ImBlogCrazy said...

I'm with you Stephen!

The Shmoo I think about it, the sadder I get...

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